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Being a mother doesn't mean you stop taking care of yourself.
By Jessica M. Miller
Last updated on Mar 20, 2024
Think back to the last time that your alarm blared and you woke feeling excited to start your day. If you're like most, it’s been a while. Don’t panic, simply shock yourself back to life by following three easy steps. Reprioritize, make time to play and wake up. I used to be surprised by all the scowls and frowns that I'd pass on the way to the school drop-off line. Now I’m shocked if I see a parent with a little pep in her step or who has a smile to share. Why is everyone so ticked off? It’s simple — their lives consist of all work and no play. Answer this: When was the last time that you went to the park with your kid and let your inner child play? Your phone doesn’t count. We're so wrapped up in our heads that we're rarely present to experience our lives.
Here are 3 tiny habits incredibly happy moms practice:
1. They reprioritize their life.
Tell me the five values closest to your heart — for example, family time, relaxation, friends, fun and good health. Great. Now compare your values to the way that you choose to live your life. Do your values and lifestyle align? NO! Breathe, you're not alone. Most would answer, not even close.” Make one choice this week that brings your life back in line with your values. Ditch clean up for a little in order to sneak away with your kid to the beach. You’ll be amazed by how much change can be made in the course of a couple of months.
2. THey make time to play.
"The opposite of work is depression, not play” –Brené Brown. Your heart literally sings when you play. This week, rather than doing the dishes while your kid paints, put down the pot and pick up the brush. Let your mind rest and your heart take over. Allow the creativity to flow naturally, letting go of the judgments, criticisms, and imperfections.
3. They live in the moment.
We can go through our entire day and not be present for any of it. Think back to the last car ride you had with your kids and answer the following: What did they wear? What did you smell? What was the car temp like? Did you taste anything? What did you hear? You don't remember? That’s because you’re running on autopilot. Automated living makes us think that we're so smart by multitasking, when in reality we’re allowing precious moments to be stolen.
Our thinking mind literally hijacks our experiences. That's until we shut it off and turn on our present mind. Right now for one minute, I want you to become aware of your five senses and ask yourself: What do I see? What do I feel? What do I smell? What do I hear? What do I taste? Tell me, did you think about your never-ending ‘to-do’ list, the things you didn’t get done at work, or how flat your hair looks today? I bet not. That’s because you were present. The only way to get out of our heads and into our lives is to wake up. Can this be done?
Understand that creating a "playground" life is not like flipping a switch. You have to unlearn old patterns of existing by making different choices. How will I know that I'm back in the automated coma? You'll know that you’re living too much in your head when the alarm sounds and your heart sinks. When this happens (and it will) simply restart step one. This is your one chance to live. Don’t waste it by taking life so seriously. Lighten up, and join in on the fun, and that’s how you create your personal playground.
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Jessica M. Miller is a relationship, personal development, and motivational coach. She's the author of Back 2 Love and How to Start a Mental Health Private Practice.