The 3 Fatal Mistakes That Make Men Lose Interest Fast

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Dating Advice For Why Men Pull Away & Lose Their Attraction To You
Love, Heartbreak

Stop his disappearing magician act.

If you’ve ever had a guy you're dating suddenly lose interest in you after you thought you had something amazing going, you know how painful it can be. It's like getting the rug pulled out from underneath you, especially if they ghost you. 

Why do men pull away? Was it something you said? Something you did?

There are so many unanswered questions on why his attraction towards you suddenly dwindled. And, too often, he’s long gone before you can get to the bottom of this mystery.

RELATED: There's Only One Reason A Guy Ever Lets A Woman Go (Yes, Really)

It helps to know why guys suddenly just lose interest in you.

Not only do they give you the skills to know how to attract men, but keeping them in mind will also lead to successful relationships in the future.

Here are 3 reasons why men pull away so quickly.

1. You had sex too soon

Hooking-up and having sex with a guy too soon distracts him from getting to know you as a human being. The number one reason why guys disappear is that they perceived you as a sex object and never really got to know you as a person.

This is an easy fix. When a guy is aiming towards a hook up with you or to have sex with you too soon, simply state the following: "I’m really attracted to you. You’re funny, charming and sexy. However, I don’t feel comfortable having sex (I’m enjoying making out with you) until I get to know you better. What do you think?"

Will this lower your hook-up rates? Absolutely! Will some guys argue with you and complain? Absolutely! Will a guy who is really into you and wants to get to know you say that he understands and is willing to get to know you better? Yes, and that’s what you're looking for.

You want a guy who cares about how you feel and wants to make sure you’re comfortable. He’s not in a hurry, because he’s comfortable with himself. He enjoys the challenge of winning you over. This is how you separate the mature men who want a relationship from the boys.

2. You suddenly want a commitment

To be fair, this only happens when you don't follow the step above. You might get upset when you have sex with a guy too soon and then he suddenly becomes less attentive or loses interest. You want to know what’s going on, so you ask him.

Meanwhile, the guy, for his part, thinks you’re cool with hooking-up because frankly, you did. He assumes no responsibility for your feelings because it wasn’t required to sleep with you and he’s startled when you get upset. 

Then, when you ask him about a commitment and whether or not he’s really into you, you get a lot of backpedaling and wishy-washy answers until you don’t see him again.

RELATED: 3 Secret Reasons Men Eventually Leave 'Good' Women

3. You’re just not compatible

Sometimes, your lives just don’t fit together. Men are often the first to recognize this. They realize you want to be married and have children. Or, his career is going to move him out of the state or country. He just doesn’t see a future with you. 

And, sometimes, since he didn’t take the time to get to know you better, he loses interest because he’s just not that into you. This usually happens when he wasn’t invested. He hadn’t spent the time to get to know you.

There’s nothing to do about this one. It is what it is. You’re looking for the right guy and to do that, you have to get comfortable losing the wrong ones.

Courtship is a test of time and it will greatly reduce your return and starting over rates. 

Get a guy who wants to pass this test of time and he will be much more ready to be in a relationship with you. And the time to find out if he wants a relationship is before you have sex. Asking for commitments is much harder to sell afterward. It all comes down to this rule: require him to get to know you first.

As you get to know a guy, sometimes, he will suddenly lose interest because he doesn’t see the point in having a conversation about things that you are not compatible on. He doesn’t want what you want, and he knows it.

For your part, it’s a good rule to only fight with people you’re going to build with. Resist the urge to argue with him and if he doesn’t have the skills to communicate and negotiate with you, let him go.

Men are kind of like children, they want what they want until they get it. They lose interest in toys and they fall in love with women who require them to get to know them.

Be this type of woman. He’ll love you for it.

RELATED: 5 Heartbreaking Reasons Why Men Leave Women They Love

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James Allen Hanrahan is a highly sought after relationship coach for strong women based in Los Angeles who offers a free Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love. If you're a smart woman struggling to achieve relationship success, and tired of dating the wrong guys connect with him via his calendar link to make finding time easy.

This article was originally published at amesallenhanrahan.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.