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A midlife crisis is a real thing, but it doesn’t have to break you.
By Hilary DeCesare — Written on Sep 14, 2020
Did you know that your midlife crisis could be a positive thing?
When all you want to do is run from this time in your life, why not own it, instead? You don't have to be in a crisis — you can be a babe!
When I looked around on the web-hosting company GoDaddy, guess what? I was able to scoop up the "Midlife Babe" domain for a dollar! Can you believe it?
In today’s culture, any other phrase containing the word "babe" is taken, everything except "midlife." It’s time to change that!
First things first, what is a midlife crisis and is it real?
Coined in 1965 by Elliott Jaques, the term refers to a period of time between the ages of 45 and 65 caused by growing or aging in combination with changes in your life, including regrets.
It's defined as, "an emotional period of doubt and anxiety sometimes experienced by people who realize that their life is half over."
For you, it may feel more like a midlife mess. And although the term may sound scary, when you define your experience, you may not need to call it a crisis at all.
Start by owning your new title — midlife babe — and embrace the future!
But, before you can embrace our status as a midlife babe, make sure you recognize the signs of a midlife mess:
- Drastic changes in your habits
- Mood swings
- Impulsive decisions
- Sleep interruptions
- Negative feelings toward your aging body
- Your friends look old to you
- You feel stuck in a rut or bored
- Death feels closer as parents or friends begin dying
- Relationships suffer
- Depression
- Alcohol or drugs used to dull and numb feelings of inadequacy
- Purchase of big-ticket items or spending more
If you’re going through any of these, others your age are, too! This is when you have the opportunity to change course.
Ready to tidy up the mess and move on?
Here are 10 actionable steps to take to go from a midlife mess to a midlife babe!
1. Be aware.
You may not like where you are now, but you won’t feel stuck forever. Be aware of where you are and where you’d like to go.
2. Reset.
This idea may seem scary, but it can be a good thing. Think about what you really want, then hit reset.
Keep this handy. You’ll have to do it regularly, or you’ll backtrack to a place you no longer want to be.
3. Acknowledge what's happening.
Midlife downturns are a real thing. But instead of focusing on what you should’ve done, give yourself a break.
When you acknowledge that it’s OK to feel this way, you can release the past and reset to make the second half of life better.
4. Slow down.
It’s easy to want to hurry up the process. But you need to ask yourself: "What is the cost of my decisions?"
Many poor midlife choices we make — such as an affair or a drastic career change — may go another way if we just slow down first.
5. Try something new.
It’s time to step outside of the box. The number-one way to get unstuck is to do something interesting, something to talk about.
Consider some of my clients (some names have been changed):
- Jackie decided to drive a race car.
- Karen became a belly dancer.
- Leslie changed jobs from one she wasn’t crazy about to one she loves.
6. Move your body.
Get outside! Sunshine and exercise can change your mood and your environment. Even the simple act of breathing can change your current outlook, so get ready to move!
7. Give to get.
Remember, it’s not all about you! Figure out how to give of yourself, and you’ll get more than you can imagine.
8. Talk about it.
Chances are, others are feeling the same way you are. Keep in touch with your friends and connect. Don’t pull away!
Take a moment today and call someone who needs to hear from you.
9. Realign yourself.
If you don’t like your current plan, change it.
Don’t be so set in your own ways that you can’t throw it out and start over. Create a new plan and realign!
10. Smile.
It may feel like the last thing you want to do, but smiling makes you feel happier. British researchers found that one genuine smile can generate the same brain stimulation as 2,000 chocolate bars.
That’s worth a try!
A midlife crisis can lead to growth and development to a midlife babe. That’s you and me, so let's own it!
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Hilary DeCesare is the Founder and CEO of The ReLaunch Co. She’s appeared on ABC’s The Secret Millionaire and on major news outlets such as CBS, ABC, Fox, Huffington Post, and Yahoo, and offers several ReLaunch courses and coaching. To connect with her directly or for media requests please email hello@therelaunchco.com
This article was originally published at The ReLaunch Co -. Reprinted with permission from the author.