17 Signs You Have Romantic Feelings For A "Platonic Friend"

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not just friends

Can men and women just be friends?

Most people agree that they can, with the help of clear boundaries. But when does an opposite sex friendship cross the line?

All relationships, whether romantic or friendly, are based upon some form of attraction. It's not always physical or sexual. However, there's some mutual interest or commonality that draws two people towards one another. While opposite sex friendships may start off with the best of intentions, often the lines become blurred as the relationship develops. 

Here are 17 red flags that you're either in a danger zone or have already crossed the line into more than just friendship with your "friend."

  1. You wait to share conversations with your friend.
  2. You discuss your relationship problems with them and it's a form of criticism towards your partner. 
  3. Your friend discusses his/her relationship problems with you. 
  4. You look forward to seeing your friend more than your own partner (The average couple engages in approximately five minutes of quality conversation per day). 
  5. You start making comparisons between your partner and your friend.
  6. You offer more compassion and concern to your friend than your partner.
  7. You fantasize what life is like with your friend.
  8. You spend more alone time with your friend than your partner.
  9. You partner has absolutely no access to your conversations with your friend (voice mails, texts, emails, Social Media, etc.).
  10. You secretly spend money on your friend without your partner's knowledge.
  11. Your friend is a source of argument and discord with your partner. 
  12. You lie and secretly figure out ways to spend time with your friend (leave early, stay late, etc.).
  13. You accuse your partner of jealousy every time your friend is discussed.
  14. You create exclusive rituals with your friend that you both highly anticipate.
  15. You share feelings and intimate conversations with your friend, which creates an emotional connection.
  16. You engage in sexually suggestive conversation with your friend.
  17. You frequent social places and events without your partner, hoping to run into your friend. 

Where do you stand on opposite-sex friendships? Whatever your answer is, make sure that you and your spouse are on the same page. Remember, that's the most important relationship of all.