How To Know When It's Time To Break Up With Someone When Your Relationship Isn't Bad, But It's Not Great Either
It's not always an easy, black-and-white decision to make.
Brandon Erlinger Ford via unsplash Being in a relationship that makes you feel unhappy more often than not might have you wondering when to break up with your toxic partner — especially when you can't seem to leave.
You will encounter different kinds of relationships in life. If a time comes where you've ended up in a toxic relationship, how do you get yourself to let go? When is it time to break up? What are the signs you should break up?
Right now, it seems like your relationship problems only get worse and worse with each day. You can't help but ask yourself, "Should we break up?"
And, in order to get through a breakup alive and kicking, you should be able to know the proper motivation in getting out of it. For sure, you will have a difficult time figuring out how to let go of someone you love after everything you've gone through together.
And while you might wonder how one can stay in a toxic relationship and not want to get out, the answer always seems to be love.
Don’t think about the number of years you were together. Think about the number of years that you will waste on each other if you force yourselves to stay in this kind of relationship.
If you find it very challenging, here are 7 good reasons to break up and leave your relationship.
1. You're not happy anymore
If you want to know if it's time to get out of your relationship, ask yourself time and time again if you're still happy with it. And life is too short to remain in a messed-up relationship.
Don’t make yourself suffer by undergoing and feeling needless pain. And bear in mind that your happiness is in your own hands. If something’s making you miserable, let go of it.
One of the signs that you're no longer happy with your partner is that you can’t seem to agree on anything anymore.
If you’ve been together for a long time now, then you are already highly familiar with your partner’s habits and ways. And since compromise is one of the strongest foundations of a relationship, not agreeing about everything can make you incredibly miserable in the process.
2. Being in a relationship with them is worse than being alone
Relationships are supposed to make you feel better. So, if it is making you feel worse in the process, then it is one of the certain signs that you need to let it go.
The worst thing about being a relationship is feeling alone while together with another person. It makes relationships futile if you think that rather than providing you with comfort and companionship, it makes you feel lonely instead.
Never think that being in a toxic relationship is better than being alone because the fact of the matter is, you can be happy being by yourself but you can never be happy if you are in a messed up relationship.
3. Being you is not enough anymore
Another way to know when to end a relationship is by looking at yourself.
You came into the relationship with who you are. Are you still the person you want to be while in the relationship? While there will always be changes in both of you, you need to check and evaluate yourself if you are still the "you" that you want to be.
The usual relationships that make a person not enough anymore with who they are usually shown if they have built everything on their relationships. You are worth something with or without your relationship.
And if you feel like the "you" you are now is not enough anymore, then maybe it is time to find the "you" that you want to be.
4. Your relationship keeps you from growing
Relationships are meant to help you grow to who you want to be together with someone else. In fact, a relationship is a being with someone and growing with that someone.
If the relationship is hindering your own growth, then it may be the best time to let go of that relationship.
It’s true that relationships are supposed to be challenging but you must evaluate your relationship according to how it can still improve and benefit you.
A relationship must provide you with what you need, whether it is in the simple act of feeling good and companionship to improving yourself together.
5. You are always denying the ugly truths
There are several ugly truths that you must bear in mind in order to accept the fact that you are in a toxic relationship.
Some of these ugly truths that can definitely tell you why you need to get out of it are:
- You are the only person putting in the effort in the relationship.
- Things are not the same anymore as there were when you started the relationship.
- You don’t trust each other anymore
If these ugly truths are spot on in your relationship and you keep on denying them, then it is a crucial time to get out of it.
6. You doubt what you mean to them
Are you currently in doubt of what you really mean with each other? If the answer is "yes," then it is time to evaluate your relationship.
What are the factors that make you doubt the relationship? Do you feel like your partner does not give you what you deserve in your relationship anymore?
If you can’t remove the doubt on your mind, this is one of the most accurate signs that you have to work on your relationship.
7. You aren't able to make room for healthy relationships
Why do you need to get out of this toxic relationship? It is in order to make room for healthy relationships that you can have in the future.
Think of the wonderful years you have ahead of you and end the relationship before wasting even more time on it. Yes, you can actually stop the misery and be happy in a healthy relationship.
Breaking up is never easy and no one wants to go through it. But, knowing when to leave a relationship is just as important as knowing if it's worth it staying. And, sometimes, it's not.
It's time to put your happiness first with the happier and healthier relationship you deserve.
Donna Begg is an expert editor, a mentor, analyst, and researcher.