Why Telling Him How You Feel Is Better Than Playing Games

Photo: Maria Markevich /
How To Tell A Guy You Like Him Without Scaring Him Away

Do you ever worry that you're going to scare a man away if you tell him how you feel? Are you afraid of not only the rejection, but the possible embarrassment of being vulnerable when the object of your affection doesn't feel the same way?

You aren’t alone. Many women find themselves playing games or pretending not to care in order to keep a man attracted and interested. But luckily, there are a few successful methods for how to tell a guy you like him.

Now, what’s interesting is that what drives a man away isn’t showing him how you feel or being honest. Feelings by themselves don’t scare a man — it’s what you’re doing with those feelings that makes all the difference.

What drives men away?

RELATED: 9 Ways To Flirt With A Guy (But In A Sneaky, Subtle Way)

The most certain and complete way to drive a man away (and as far away as possible) is to become overly needy, clingy, and suspicious because you’re feeling unsure of where things stand or what he wants from your relationship.

Whatever you’re afraid of actually becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. That’s because once you subconsciously believe something to be true, you tend to find proof of it everywhere.

In this case, it becomes reality because your anxiety causes you to be needy and clingy — and completely kills any attraction he felt for you.

Often, problems in relationships don’t require answers — they require a different belief system. Change what you believe and you can prevent problems in the first place.

What attracts men to you?

A man expects that if a woman likes him, then she should feel good when she's around him.

However, if you’re constantly stressed, worried or unhappy around him — whatever the reason — it makes him feel inadequate. It will compel him to want to spend less time around you because he doesn't like how he feels when you're together.

How do you tell a guy you like him that will make him not only communicate your needs, but make him more attracted to you?

RELATED: How To Know When & What To Text A Guy You Really, Really Like (A Lot!)

Here are 3 steps to try.

1. Be clear about what you want from him.

And what you expect without frustrating or confusing him even more!

Men aren’t great at giving emotional support and nurturing, and they’re equally bad at figuring out what’s bothering you or why you’re unhappy. Know what you want from him and be clear about it. And don't expect him to be a mind-reader.

2. Find out why you’re chronically unsatisfied with him.

Men want to be around women who make them feel good about themselves. Telling him that he's constantly doing things wrong is just a big turn-off for him!

3. Don’t hide what you’re thinking and feeling because you think you’ll scare him away.

Men actually expect women to be a kind of "emotional leader” in relationships. Women bring a deeper and richer emotional aspect to their lives they don’t have elsewhere.

In general, the way to attract a man is to feel good about yourself, and know what you want and how to communicate it clearly. When a man sees that you feel great, he will feel great too, and everything else will magically get easier.

RELATED: 5 Secrets Nobody Tells You About Winning (And Keeping) A Man's Heart

Christian Carter is the author of the e-book “Catch Him & Keep Him.” He has helped more than 3 million women become more successful with men, dating, and relationships. Subscribe to Christian’s free e-newsletter