12 Tiny Signs The Man You're In Love With Is Actually A Sociopathic Monster

He's manipulating you into thinking you're the crazy one.

Last updated on Apr 29, 2024

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You think you've met your Prince Charming ... and he seems a little too good to be true. Well, he just might be! If that little voice in your head telling you something does not feel right, things are moving quickly, then stop, listen, and take notes. That little voice in your head is called “gut instinct,” listen to it! You may be dating a sociopath — one of the worst predators in the dating and relationship world. Once you become sucked into his proverbial claws, escape can be challenging. You do not leave without mental (or sometimes even physical) scars to remind you of the very abusive relationship you have just experienced.

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Here are 12 signs the guy you're in love with is a sociopathic monster:

1. They ooze charm

They are extremely charming and normally very charismatic. They are the center of attention at parties and very well-liked in social circles, but it is superficial.

RELATED: 10 Subtle Signs He's Gaslighting You (And Making You Feel Crazy)

2. They tend to be very attractive

They have a high attraction and use this to their advantage.

3. "I love you" happens fast

They quickly tell you they are in love and move the relationship at a whirlwind rate. You are caught up in the excitement of the romance and lose your head.

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4. They flood you with attention

They overdose you with attention at first: calling, emailing, texting, spending all their time with you. They may also buy gifts take you on trips or do whatever it takes to win you fast.

5. Sociopaths will try to "lock you in" quickly

They try and lock the relationship in by either moving in together, engagement, or getting married within a very short amount of time. They know they cannot hide their bad behavior long so they will try to cement the deal before you become aware and try and leave.

6. They always play the victim in stories from their past

They are never responsible for any past relationship issues, nor will they be responsible for any in the future. They are incapable of seeing their faults.

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RELATED: What Life As A Sociopath Is Really Like, According To Sociopaths

7. They will manipulate your sense of pity

They play upon your sympathy for all things they do. Blaming it on childhood scars, work problems, relationship issues, money problems, etc.

8. You'll notice their "angry eyes"

They say the eyes are the windows to the soul; this is a great place to notice there is something very wrong. When they are angry, there is a cold hostile intensity that is unnerving.

9. They are masters at pathological lying

It doesn’t seem to matter what it is about, they make “lying” a way of life. They use it as a tool to make life easier.

10. Sociopaths seem to feel no guilt

When they cheat, lie, or hurt someone they love; there is no real sense of guilt. They may be unhappy they are caught, but they will do it again, remorse is not part of their genetic makeup.

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11. They have a "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde" behavior pattern

You are dealing with two very different people, the charming man you met and fell in love with, and the abusive cruel, unfeeling, lying manipulative man who has no feelings. You keep waiting for the first one to resurface — but, eventually, you see less and less of that guy you first met. 

12. They are comfortable breaking rules

They tend to have no respect for rules regulations or the law. They enjoy pushing the envelope for the rush of adrenaline power and the control it allows them.

RELATED: 7 Cruel Ways Sociopathic Manipulators Trick You Into Doing Anything They Want

Another key trait to watch for is a “sociopathic cycle” in the relationship:

1. Phase 1

Everything is wonderful, you are both in a euphoric state, with great intimacy, and romance, and everything is perfect.

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2. Phase 2

There is a slow subtle change where the sociopath starts to find faults with your new love and you want to bring back the wonderful feelings and try to please him. You become fearful of losing or displeasing him.

3. Phase 3

There are some incident that happens that triggers him: physical abuse, verbal abuse, anger, fighting, threats, and intimidation.

4. Phase 4

This is the makeup stage, the sociopath will be very remorseful, apologize, promise to never repeat the behavior, blame you for his behavior, and deny and gaslight the situation.

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5. Phase 5

This is a calm phase in which the relationship returns to a loving romantic relationship, the incident is forgotten until the cycle repeats itself.

If you think you may be experiencing depression or anxiety as a result of ongoing emotional abuse at the hands of a narcissist, you are not alone.

Domestic abuse can happen to anyone and is not a reflection of who you are or anything you've done wrong.

If you feel as though you may be in danger, there is support available 24/7/365 through the National Domestic Violence Hotline by calling 1-800-799-7233. If you’re unable to speak safely, text LOVEIS to 1-866-331-9474.

RELATED: 12 Signs He's Not In Love With You — He's Obsessed

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Deni Abbie is a certified Life Coach, Dating and Relationship Coach, Hypnotherapist, syndicated author, and public speaker.