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Woman Asks If She's Wrong For Wanting To Spend Christmas Alone, Despite Her Mother Wanting To Visit

Photo: Rodnae Productions and Nicole Michalou / Pexels.
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Christmas is a time to celebrate with family, but one woman wonders if she’s in the wrong for wanting to spend the holiday alone. 

She posted on the thread Am I Being Unreasonable (AIBU) on mumsnet, an online forum for English parents seeking advice on family woes. 

The woman opened her tale by stating that she’ll be alone for Christmas for the first time in four years, but she’s not unhappy about this development. 

Her ex-husband asked to take their kids for the holiday, and her partner is working, so she’s on her own for the day. 

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She’s planned a quiet, low-key celebration for herself, involving “having a bit of a lie in then a bacon sandwich and a cup of tea.” 

She stated that she’s really looking forward to her time alone, during which she’s going to binge-watch a show and relax on her own time. 

All she wants is “a nice quiet day where I can eat crap foods and drink too much pop or wine and then fall asleep at 5pm from a food coma.”

The problem is that her own mother wants to come over for Christmas, ruining her well-laid plans for the day. 

The woman stated that she’s in “low contact” with her mother, for whom Christmas has always been “a big thing.” 

She has never liked Christmas, even when she was a kid.

She added that her mother had a meltdown in her driveway last Christmas because of her lack of decorations.

"She seems to think everyone should love Christmas. My partner is Jewish and doesn’t even celebrate it. When she learned that all hell practically broke loose," she writes in her post. 

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She won’t be lonely during the holiday, because “Christmas is just like any other day for me.”

Part of the reason she maintains very little contact with her mother is because of her mother’s overbearing tendencies.

“I’ve lived alone since I was eighteen but she refuses to see me as an adult,” the woman wrote. “Am I being unreasonable in telling her to bog off?”

When one user replied that telling her mother to “bog off” seemed harsh, most users agreed that she wasn’t being unreasonable, at all. 

“You deserve to do what is right for you, and the day you have planned sounds perfect,” wrote one user. 

Another user commented that the woman should stand firm in her decision, and she should “just say ‘sorry mum but no’ or even just ‘no.’”

That same user continued, saying that “whether she thinks of you as an adult is immaterial — you are, and are allowed to do what you want in your own home.” 

The woman said, “my mum drives me barmy and always has done. But I may just invite her over on Boxing Day for a coffee and a bit of cake, just to soothe things over.” 

Family politics are always complex, but here’s hoping the woman will stick to her boundaries and have her solo celebration.

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Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers celebrity gossip, pop culture analysis and all things to do with the entertainment industry.

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