Woman Finds Out Her Best Friend Is Having An Affair With A Married Man & Decides To Tell His Wife
She doesn't condone cheating in her friendships.
Liza Summer / Shutterstock A woman decided to intervene after finding out that her best friend was involved in an improper relationship with a much older man.
Posting to the subreddit r/TrueOffMyChest — a forum where users can share personal things that have been bothering them without fear of opinions and unwarranted advice — she explained that she'd recently found out her best friend of five years was involved in an affair.
She found out her best friend was having an affair with a married man and decided to tell his wife.
In her Reddit post, the woman wrote that she and her friend, who are both 20, have been friends for half a decade. She considered her friend as a sister, and the two of them were extremely close, always telling each other about everything happening in their lives.
Her friend recently divulged that she was having an affair with a married man who was thirty years older than her and had children and grandchildren.
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"I told her to end it because she was being stupid. She knows that I don’t condone cheating. I try to keep an open mind but some things, like cheating, I do not tolerate," she wrote.
Her friend, however, refused to end the affair, making the excuse that hooking up with the married man made her "feel good about herself," and that if he wanted to step outside of his marriage with his wife, it wasn't her problem to deal with it.
"I asked her what about his wife and she said she doesn’t care about his wife. Her words were, 'If his wife was being a good wife then he wouldn’t be out here f-king her.' And that just pissed me off."
So, she decided to tell the man's wife about the affair herself, since her friend wouldn't do it.
She rounded up all of her text messages with her friend, which included videos of her and the married man hooking up, their conversations together, the dates they went on, the gifts he purchased for her, and videos of him speaking ill of his wife.
She was able to find the man on social media, and from there, found his wife's account and sent her a direct message with all of the screenshots and proof that he was having an affair.
"Then I sent [my] friend a text saying, paraphrasing here, that she is the scum of the earth and I don’t want anything to do with her. After that, I blocked her on everything," she continued. She explained that, for her, a huge dealbreaker in her friendships is cheating, and that no matter how long she's been friends with someone, she'll cut them off if they cheat.
"Cheaters truly are horrible people. And they aren’t gonna get any sympathy or kindness out of me," she concluded.
Most Reddit users agreed that she did the right thing by telling the man's wife about the affair.
"More support from me. You did the right thing. This guy could be putting his wife's physical health at risk ([especially] if your former friend wasn't the only affair), and definitely put her mental health in a [bad] place," one user wrote. "Don't forget to take time to grieve the loss of your friendship; it's a legit thing."
Another user agreed, writing, "Friends look out for each other, you told her to stop and she didn’t listen, you did the right thing."
"If I was getting cheated on I would 100% want someone to tell me. Crazy people are saying you are policing when you are just being a good human being," a third user pointed out.
While infidelity in marriages is a saddening discovery, research shows that 35% of married men who have been married for more than 10 years have an affair at some point in their relationship.
According to board-certified behavior analyst Carmen McGuinness, cheaters mostly suffer from some form of personality disorder, including narcissism. "Narcissists are more likely to have a greater desire for casual sex and to engage in sex without emotional attachment."
"Infidelity and narcissism have a strong correlation to psychopathy. Psychopathy is a condition in which an individual is unable to feel empathy for other people," McGuiness said.
"There is a 95 percent likelihood that a psychopath or sociopath will seek other sexual partners outside a relationship."
Nia Tipton is a writer living in Brooklyn. She covers pop culture, social justice issues, and trending topics.