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Woman Wonders If She's Wrong For Not Telling Her Husband She's In Labor So She Can Name The Baby Herself

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woman in labor

A woman is left wondering if she was in the wrong for not telling her husband she was going into labor.

The now-mother of three posted her story on r/AmItheA**hole (AITA) to get outside opinions on her predicament.

The woman begins her post by detailing the relationship between her and her husband.

The two have been married for five years and she says she loves him. She also mentions that her husband is “a mama’s boy.”

That causes issues when she claims her mother-in-law hates her.

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“I grew up in a richer neighborhood and my parents left me with quite a lot of inheritance money when they passed ( about 13 million in assets),” she writes. “MIL however was a single mother with 2 sons and had a lot of trouble just paying for basic needs, she worked her way up and I think she is very strong. She doesn’t like me and thinks I’m pretentious because apparently I ‘had everything handed to me.’”

When the woman became pregnant with her third child, her husband and mother-in-law insisted she name the baby Francine after a late family relative.

This is after she already named her second child Luke, 4, after her husband’s late father.

She wanted to name the girl Valerie because the Amy Winehouse song of the same name was important to her family. She wanted to honor her parents and older sister, who passed away three years earlier in a house fire, with the name, but her husband and mother-in-law balked at the suggestion. Even when she suggested they include both names, with one being the middle name, they weren’t satisfied.

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With just a month to go before her due date, her husband grew more and more insistent over the name he wanted. That’s when she decided she had enough.

“I finally snapped and said that I wasn’t going to name my child an ugly name that I don’t like for the sake of a woman that doesn’t even like me,” she writes.

She apologized soon after the argument, but he left to be with his mother.

Three days later, she went into labor without her husband knowing and named the baby Valerie, with a middle name in honor of her late mother. 

When her husband and mother-in-law came into the delivery room, they were both furious over her not telling them she went into labor and naming the baby what she did. Her husband even called her a “pretentious backstabbing b***h.”

She ends the post by pondering if this incident marked the end of her marriage.

Most people in the thread voted that the woman was not the a**hole (NTA).

Many criticized the husband for taking his mother’s side rather than his wife’s who he’s supposed to stick with through thick and thin.

“One thing I’ve learned about mama’s boys is that they will never, ever, EVER choose you over their mom,” the top commenter wrote. “Get out of this situation, it’s better to be on your own than with someone like him. NTA.”

Some also said it was unreasonable for him to have all the say in naming the child after they already named a child after his late father.

Some more even suggested that she seek a divorce because of how he acted.

“Honey, contact a lawyer and leave,” another top commenter wrote. “You don’t want this man to be involved any more than necessary in your life, trying to strong-arm you into getting his way after you offered compromises.”

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Jonathan Alfano is a writer who focuses on news and entertainment topics. He majors in journalism at the University of Central Florida with a minor in sports business. Follow him on Twitter.