Mom Wants Teacher To Stop Allowing Her Daughter To Get 'Unwanted Hugs' But Wonders If She’s Overreacting

She is teaching her daughter about consent.

Kids hugging Alinute Silzeviciute / Shutterstock 

A mother claims that her young daughter has been receiving unwanted hugs from one of her classmates, despite her telling him to stop.

The mother eventually had to take matters into her own hands and notify her daughter’s teacher.

However, ever since she requested the teacher to stop the student from hugging her daughter, the teacher’s attitude toward her shifted.

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The mother claims that her daughter’s teacher has been rude to her ever since she asked her to stop one of her daughter’s classmates from hugging her.

Posting her story on the subreddit, "r/AmItheA-–hole," the mother asked other Redditors if she was in the wrong for how she handled the situation.

She began her post that she has a six-year-old daughter.

Recently, her daughter came home from school upset over an incident involving one of her classmates.

“There’s a boy in her class who keeps hugging her even though she doesn’t want to hug him,” the mother wrote. “She has told him multiple times she does not want to, yet he holds on to her.”


The mother added that her daughter has informed her teacher about the unwanted hugs, yet it continued to happen in the classroom.

The mother and her husband are teaching their children about consent, and have expressed to them that they do not have to engage in physical touch with anyone they don’t want to.

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“They have the right to deny unwanted touch from anyone. Their bodies are their bodies, and if they do not want to hug someone they don’t have to,” she wrote.

“We do this as a safety precaution so they grow up knowing that no one has the right to touch them in any way that they do not want.”


The mother decided to let the teacher know about the situation herself and requested that she talk to the student and advise him to stop hugging her daughter.

“The teacher said she will, but caught an attitude about it,” the mother wrote. “Like I was being horrible to this poor boy who just wants to show affection.”

The mother acknowledged that she knows the boy’s intentions are pure, however, her daughter had the right to refuse hugs from him if she didn’t want them.

She reported that her daughter’s teacher has been “cold” to her ever since.

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Redditors supported the mother for teaching her children consent and criticized her daughter’s teacher.

“You’re raising your kids right,” one user commented. “She [the teacher] is probably the same type of person who blames teenage girls for distracting boys instead of blaming boys for not focusing.”

“The teacher should be telling that boy to keep his hands to himself! This is a great learning moment about consent, and the teacher is f–king it up,” another user wrote. “Good for your little one for sticking up for herself!”

“It is never too young of an age for a boy to learn that just because he wants to touch a girl, does not mean she wants to be touched and does not mean he can touch her,” another user added.


Even if you do not intend any harm with physical touch, you should always obtain a person’s consent, no matter how young you are.

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Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.