Man Wonders If He's Wrong For Booking Hotel Room To Escape His 'Sobbing' Wife

He's being called selfish and insensitive.

man in hotel ViDI Studio / Shutterstock
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A man revealed how he handled the wake of grief that followed his father-in-law’s death, including an interrupted sleep schedule. 

Sharing his story on the subreddit AmITheA–hole, the main explained that due to his wife’s grief keeping him awake at night, he had no choice but to book a hotel room so that he could get some sleep. 

Now, he is wondering if his decision was selfish. 

The man shared that he left his wife alone and booked a hotel because she was "sobbing" all night after her father’s death. 

The man began his post by revealing that his wife’s father passed away recently and they flew into his hometown for the funeral. 

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They planned on staying at the man’s in-law's home during their trip. “My in-laws gave us the guests' room to spend the night in,” the man wrote. 

After the long journey and the funeral, the man claimed that he was exhausted and needed sleep. 

“I was so tired and since I'm a light sleeper I can't fall asleep easily or I could wake up easily,” he shared. 

However, falling asleep proved to be difficult for the man due to his wife’s “constant sobbing.”

   

   

“Ever since we got back from the funeral my wife kept sobbing. Just sobbing for hours even in bed,” the man wrote. 

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“I could not sleep at all and was so tired. I tried calming her down but to no avail.” The man asked his wife if she could “let him sleep” for a while, although she continued weeping. 

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In an attempt to get some sleep, the man booked a hotel for the night and packed his stuff. He ran into his mother-in-law on the way out. 

“Her mom saw me leave and side-eyed me after I told her why,” the man wrote. After he got to the hotel, the man’s wife sent him an angry message. 

“My wife called me twice and then left a very angry message calling me horrible and selfish for basically 'abandoning' her and going to a hotel just so I could sleep instead of being there for her to support her in her time of need,” he wrote. 

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His wife continued to give the man the cold shoulder after they returned home from his in-laws, telling her husband that he acted “coldly” and “nonchalantly” following her loss. 

“What was I supposed to do? I needed sleep,” the man argued. 

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Redditors slammed the man for his behavior toward his grieving wife. 

“Your wife obviously wasn't sleeping either. For one night, the night of her father's funeral, just give up some sleep, lie with her, hold her, and be present with her. It's not about you and your REM cycle on this day,” one user pointed out. 

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“'It was only one night'" you're right. It was a super important 'only' one night, and you made the wrong choice. She has every right to be furious with you,” another user commented. 

“Well, there goes my faith in humanity for the day," said one Redditor.

“Her father died and you ran away from her crying?” another user wrote. 

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“There are situations in life where you just have to eat it and be there for your loved ones, no matter how uncomfortable you are. This would have been one of those times,” another added. 

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Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.