Great-Grandmother Refuses To Meet Her Great-Granddaughter Since She Is Not A Fan Of Her Name
She was insulted by the name choice and believes that her family was "mocking" her.
Tanya Yatsenko, Cameramannz, fizkes / Shutterstock A new mother cannot help but feel saddened after she learned that not everyone in her family would be meeting her baby daughter. However, this was not because of the fact that some of her family members were no longer around.
The woman’s grandmother, who is alive and well, decided that she would not be meeting her great-grandchild after she learned the baby’s name.
The woman’s grandmother disapproves of her new great-grandchild’s name and believes it was a jab at her.
Sharing her story on the subreddit, r/AmITheA–-hole, the 27-year-old woman revealed that she and her 31-year-old husband recently welcomed their first child, a baby girl, together. The woman claims that her daughter is absolutely perfect and is looking forward to having her family meet her.
“A fun tradition that my family does is to have a small get-together once the baby is about two to three months old,” the woman wrote.
Additionally, the name of the baby is kept a secret from the rest of the family until they are born. “At the little party, we give the parents a bunch of little gifts that have the new baby’s name on them,” the woman shared.
Every time a new baby enters the family, the woman’s grandmother also knits them their own quilt with their name on it.
Photo: Ground Picture / Shutterstock
Before announcing her baby girl’s name to family members, there was an important background regarding the woman’s grandmother to be addressed.
“She was born as Lucille but from the time she was eight, she told every single person she met that her name was Barbara,” the woman disclosed. Her grandmother eventually even went on to legally change her name to Barbara.
When she was asked why, she always responded that she simply liked the name Barbara better than Lucille. “It became a family joke, but she never seemed upset about it and always laughed with us,” the woman wrote.
Oddly enough, the woman’s husband’s grandmother was also named Lucille, and she held a special place in his heart given the fact that she raised him from birth until she passed away when the woman’s husband was 19. “He misses her very much and said that he would love to honor her in some way,” the woman shared.
Since her husband and his grandmother would always watch the show “I Love Lucy” together, and both she and the woman’s grandmother’s original name was Lucille, it was only fitting that the couple name their daughter Lucy.
However, when they told this to the woman’s grandmother after the baby was born, she was not exactly thrilled by the name choice.
“A few of my relatives laughed and said it was cute but my grandma was dead silent,” the woman wrote. “When I asked her what was wrong she demanded to know why I chose Lucy... I began to try and explain but she suddenly hung up.”
The woman’s grandmother continued to ignore her phone calls and messages. Her older sister later told her that it was because their grandmother believed that the woman and her husband were “mocking” her by naming their baby Lucy.
“She said she’s not coming to the party in a few weeks to meet my daughter in person and that she’s not giving the baby quilt to us unless we apologize and change our daughter's name,” the woman wrote.
The entire incident has left the woman confused and heartbroken. “Births in my family are always celebrated and happy events but this has ruined it. I almost feel like some of my relatives are ignoring me because they don’t want to ‘pick sides’ but I don’t even understand why there’s a fight,” she admitted.
Although many of the woman’s family members are also confused as to why her grandmother reacted so strongly to the name choice, they believe that the woman should have consulted with her grandmother first about the name Lucy.
The woman asked Redditors if she was wrong for picking Lucy as her daughter’s name.
Many people believed that the woman did nothing wrong, and that her grandmother may have unspoken personal issues surrounding her original name.
“There's trauma there that grandma isn't sharing. But that's her issue, not yours,” one Redditor commented. “There's a lot more to the story about why your Grandma changed her name, otherwise there wouldn't have been such a dramatic reaction,” another user wrote.
However, this did not mean that people thought that not wanting to meet her great-granddaughter was justified.
“You can name your child whatever you want, and to be honest for your Grandma to make such a big deal over something that has ZERO significance to anyone but her, to the point of punishing you and her grandchild, is malevolent, childish, and downright mean,” one user shared. “I also think your grandmother is being ridiculous. If this is the hill she wants to die on, that’s her choice,” another user revealed.
There are some children who will never get the chance to meet their grandparents or great-grandparents since they passed away before they were even born.
To have grandparents, and better yet, great-grandparents who are still around and have close ties to your family, is lucky.
If you are a great-grandparent and there is a way for you to be involved in your great-grandchild’s life, you should not hesitate to jump on the opportunity (even if their name is one that you do not particularly like).
Photo: Tania Kolinko / Shutterstock
Great-grandparents can spoil their grandchildren with endless cuddles when their parents’ tank is on empty, provide some insightful family history, and even increase happiness levels for both sides, according to an American Sociological Association study.
"We found that an emotionally close grandparent-adult grandchild relationship was associated with fewer symptoms of depression for both generations," Sara M. Moorman, an assistant professor in the Department of Sociology and the Institute on Aging at Boston College, and co-author of the study, said.
One person who could benefit from speaking to a professional like Moorman is definitely the woman’s grandmother, who most certainly has some unearthed trauma from the name Lucy that she is not sharing with the rest of the family.
It is not worth never meeting her great-granddaughter whose name was not meant to insult her but was an ode to her.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.