Bride Wants Bridesmaid To Dye Her 'Unsightly' Gray Hair — 'It's Going To Take Away From The Beauty Of The Dress I Chose For Her'

The bride's priorities for her special day appear to be aesthetics and not friendship.

Bride with bridesmaids & woman with gray hair Kayla Renee & Anastasiya Lobanovskaya / Pexels 

A bride made an anonymous Facebook post complaining about one of her bridesmaid’s appearances that might not be as anonymous as she initially thought.

The beleaguered bride wrote to a Facebook group, stating, “Sorry for the anonymous post, my bridesmaid is on here,” and then continued on to give very specific details about that bridesmaid. 

Photo: Facebook


“Today, we met up for our monthly meeting to go over [the] agenda and order of the day… I noticed when my bridesmaid turned her head that she’s got quite a number of grey hairs,” the bride exclaimed.

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The bride asked her bridesmaid to dye her hair to cover up her grays, but the bridesmaid refused.

She explained that she mentioned the bridesmaid’s graying hair to her, as though it was something the woman hadn’t already noticed about herself. She stated, “I suggested dying it before my big day.”


But the bridesmaid declined to dye her hair, saying that “hairdresser appointments are too expensive and she’s allergic to box dye.”

The bride was clearly more concerned with the optics of her wedding than her bridesmaid’s feelings. “It’s really unsightly and I’m worried it’s going to take away from the beauty of the dress I chose for her.”

She asked for tips on what to do about her bridesmaid’s gray hair, explaining, 'I can’t pay for her hair appointment as I’ve exhausted my bridesmaid budget now.'

“Wedding is ten weeks away and I think her hair is only going to get worse,” the bride wrote. “She’s only 30!”

An article from Harvard University’s Health Publishing explains that the science behind graying hair most often has to do with genetic predisposition. The article states that “hair follicles produce less color as they age, so when hair goes through its natural cycle of dying and being regenerated, it's more likely to grow in as gray beginning after age 35. Genetics can play a role in when this starts.”


Not only that, but gray hair isn't something to be ashamed of or made fun of for having — it's a totally normal process for many people, and looks great! Women shouldn't be tearing down other women for something outside of their control.

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However, this seems to be indicative of the bride's personality to begin with, as one person rightfully called the bride out for her passive-aggressive behavior, claiming, “She’s 100% hoping that the bridesmaid will read this and recognize it and be secretly shamed into dying her hair.”


Others bemoaned the state of weddings in general, wondering when weddings stopped being about “celebrating the love two people have” to become joyless, self-involved spectacles.

In a society where women are constantly pressured to fit their appearances into someone else’s narrow definition of beauty, this particular bride certainly isn’t treating her bridesmaid with dignity or respect, or even kindness. 

It seems that the bridal-industrial complex has gotten the best of the bride, whose obsessive focus on her bridesmaid’s hair shows exactly where her priorities lie. 


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Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers celebrity gossip, pop culture analysis and all things to do with the entertainment industry.