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She says she was never her first choice.
By Jonathan Alfano — Written on May 15, 2022
A bride sparked a debate online when she revealed that she kicked her cousin out of her bridal party.
In search of outside opinions on the issue, the woman posted the story to the infamous subreddit r/AmItheA–hole (AITA).
On the subreddit, people can read about one’s moral dilemmas and assign them a rating of either “Not the a–hole” (NTA) or “You’re the a–hole,” depending on if they were in the right or not.
Commenters overwhelmingly voted YTA, and the details make it easy to see why.
The bride kicked her cousin out of her bridal party to make room for her sister-in-law.
29-year-old said that her fiance’s 31-year-old sister, referred to as Anne, wasn’t originally invited to the wedding, due to family conflict, but now that she is, so the bride wanted to make her a bridesmaid.
Understandably, Cassie, her cousin, was upset about being kicked out of the party and told her family and other bridesmaids.
Her fiance's family says that she made the right choice, but her mother and other bridesmaids disapprove of her actions.
The woman explains that she was set on having six bridesmaids, no more, no less.
Included in the bridal party were Cassie as well as her 38-year-old fiance other sister, Mary.
Anne getting invited after all threw a wrench into the plans.
This meant that she asked Cassie, who she admitted was her last choice for a bridesmaid and who she “had some issues with before,” to step down from the party.
She said that she would refund her for the dress and that Cassie was still invited to the wedding as a regular guest, but there was no refunding all the time she spent.
Word got around, however, and caused a divide within the group.
“Cassie seemed confused and asked why I had asked her to be a bridesmaid to begin with, to which I explained the scenario with Anne and that she deserves the spot more,” she wrote.
“Cassie eventually agreed — I thought that was the end of that, but some of my other bridesmaids said that I was being unfair to Cassie by 'kicking her out' and that I should apologize to her.”
When she confronted Cassie about what she said, her cousin said that she “just said the truth” to the other bridesmaids about what happened.
The woman then responded by calling Cassie privileged and that it “wasn’t her right to be my bridesmaid.”
Commenters swiftly slammed the woman for what she did to her cousin.
In particular, they pointed out her lack of self-awareness, questioning how she could type her entire post out without realizing that she may be in the wrong.
“It is very rude to tell someone ‘I want you to play this important role in my wedding because I value your friendship so deeply.... wait [nevermind], someone better is available now and you're the lowest ranking’ without even an apology,” one commenter wrote.
“Your behavior is gross,” another commenter wrote. “If I heard this and was going to your wedding I'd be returning your gift and making other plans.”
Jonathan Alfano is a writer who focuses on news and entertainment topics. Follow him on Twitter to keep up with his content.