How To Tell Someone You're Not Interested (Without Hurting Their Feelings)

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How To Tell Someone You're Not Interested Without Hurting Their Feelings
Self, Heartbreak

Don't ghost. Be direct.

The most dreadful part about dating and getting hit on by guys is telling them you're not interested. It’s like, you’re torn between not wanting to hurt their feelings and not being in a relationship you hate.

Breaking it off with someone isn’t as easy as walking up to him and saying “I’m not interested.”, at least for most of us.

Figuring out the right way to let him down can be really stressful, especially If you guys have been on a few dates.

RELATED: 3 Questions You Must Ask Yourself If It Feels Like Your Relationship Is Going Nowhere

I remember the days of frantically sending my friends texts asking “Is this a good way to tell him I’m not interested?” After about an hour of intense deliberation and nervousness, we’d finally come up with the perfect “break up” text. And I’d hold my breath as I press send. Then all we could do is wait for his response, which is just as nerve-wracking and sending the text in the first place.

Whether he responds in an understanding manner or inappropriately, you’ll learn a lot about the guy’s character. If he’s understanding, maybe there could be a friendship between you two in the future. Not all your relationships with men have to be romantic.

On the other hand, If he responds negatively, you should be so happy you sent it sooner rather than later. For all, you know you could have ended up dating a jerk who doesn’t realize how hard it is to be honest about your feelings.

I get that no one wants to be rejected, but we have to remember no one really likes being the rejecter either.

I have to admit ending things over text is a thousand times easier than doing it face to face. But sometimes you have no choice but to tell him you aren’t interested in person. Don’t worry, the steps below will making you a master at breaking up with someone without hurting their feelings.

1. Keep your interactions short.

If you don’t like him like that, keep the conversations short. Guys tend to assume you’re crushing on them if you talk to them for a long time. Keeping things short also reduces the chances of things escalating any further.

If you’re not sure what to say to end it, try saying “I really have to go.” or “Sorry, I have to get back to my friends.”

RELATED: 15 Things Men Say When They're Not Into You (Sorry!)​

2. Tell him, "Thank you, but no thank you".

Some guys are really bold, and they’ll ask you one a date right away. If this happens to you, tell him thanks, to let him know you appreciate the offer. But be sure to follow with a "no thank you" so that he knows you aren’t interested.

If he asks why, remember that you don’t owe him an explanation — you don’t have to answer unless you choose to.

3. Avoid flirting with him.

If you’re telling him you aren’t interested but you’re flirting with him, he’ll think you’re just playing hard to get or sending mixed signals. He won’t think you really rejected him and he’ll continue to pursue you. Don’t flirt with him altogether so there’s no room for confusion.

RELATED: 10 Ways To Turn Down A Second Date Without Looking Like A Jerk

4. Tell him that he’s in the friend zone.

Nothing kills a guy’s vibe more than hearing he’s in the friend zone. Guys hate being friend-zoned by a girl they’re interested in.

Tell him he’s just your friend and watch how fast the flirting stops.

5. If all else fails, just tell him "no" and remove yourself from the situation.

Some guys just aren’t good at taking hints or being let down easy. So you can’t shy away from being direct with them. There might even be an instance when you tell a guy no and he persists. If that continues and you feel unsafe, leave the situation altogether.

RELATED: 3 Reasons Why Your Breakup May Be The Best Thing To Ever Happen To You

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Tamara Sanon is a writer who covers pop culture, astrology, and relationship topics.

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