Photo: unsplash / kevin laminto
There's a fine line.
By PopSugar — Written on Feb 06, 2019
By Isadora Baum
These gestures might seem romantic, giving promise to a healthy, happy relationship moving forward, but it turns out they're actually red flags in disguise.
Sometimes when things seem too good to be true and the person you're dating is making grandiose gestures that flatter and charm you so early on, it can mean that there aren't good intentions there, and your partner might not be the sweetheart they appear to be.
Here's what to avoid when dating someone new. If you notice any of these signals, proceed with caution.
1. They Use Pet Names Too Early
While it may seem cute to be called "babe" or "honey" early on, this can also be a sign of neediness and falling way too quickly, David Bennett, a relationship counselor and owner of Double Trust Dating and Relationships, told POPSUGAR. "Plus, after the infatuation phase is over, it can just come across as annoying or routine," he added.
2. They Ignore Their Friends For You
It seems romantic that your partner chooses to spend time with you over their friends, but consistently ignoring close friends for a romantic relationship will eventually backfire, he said. "Everyone needs close friendships to be emotionally healthy, and giving them up for a romantic relationship isn't healthy in the long run," he explained.
3. They Text Nonstop
All-day texting can be overwhelming. "Texting all day sounds romantic, but it will quickly seem needy when you're trying to enjoy the moment you're in or actually busy with work and other projects and your partner is upset you haven't responded immediately," said Bennett. A more healthy option is to keep in contact fairly regularly, but encourage each other to be present in the moment without constant attachment to the phone. "Then meeting up later is even that much more enjoyable," added Bennett.
4. You're All Over Their Social Media
It may be cute at first that their social media has turned into a shrine to you and you two as a couple, but it's too much too soon, and it can come across as obsessive. "What does it say about a person that their entire online presence is basically about one person rather than a variety of hobbies, interests, and experiences?" said Bennett. It's not a good sign.
5. They Want to Meet Your Parents ASAP
If you just started dating and they want to meet your family, it could mean they're rushing into things and can be in it too deep. "It takes time to get to know someone, and having you meet people important to them early on may be a red flag," Kimberly Hershenson, LMSW, told POPSUGAR. Instead, discuss it openly to see where your partner is coming from and where the relationship stands.
6. They Want to Move In Together Too Fast
If it's only been a few months of dating, you shouldn't be signing a lease together. "Moving in is a big step, and it should be done with thought and planning," she said. If your partner is trying to move in before getting to know you better, it could be a warning sign.
7. They Book an Immediate Vacation
Traveling as a couple takes some time to get comfortable with, and you shouldn't plan a trip with someone you've only been on a few dates with. "Spending time 24/7 with someone early on is too much too fast," she said, so this can be a major red flag. There's a sort of urgency and dependency that doesn't sit well.
PopSugar provides informing, entertaining, and inspiring action through multi-platform content across entertainment, fashion, beauty, fitness, food, and parenting.
This article was originally published at PopSugar. Reprinted with permission from the author.