Dazzling Ombre Rainbow Starbucks Drinks Are Here — But Order With Caution

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starbucks secret menu

Like a lot of restaurants, Starbucks has a secret menu. It's one of those I've known about for a long time and have reconciled myself to never trying.

Why's that? Well because when you've got social anxiety just ordering an item off the NOT secret menu is challenging enough. I for one, am not pushing the hand's of fate on that. 

Usually, not being able to try out Starbucks secret menu items leaves me with a severe case of FOMO.

But not this time.

Here's the sitch: 

If you go to Starbucks and order either the Pink Purple Drink or the Pink Matcha Drink, you will be presented with a fruity, creamy beverage that looks a like a unicorn maybe pooped into a Starbucks cup. 

They are all the rage, but not because they taste good — because they photograph well! 

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I mean, they are probably delicious or whatever, but that doesn't matter when your chief goal is to get all of the hearts possible on Instagram, which is exactly what food bloggers are doing with the secret menu drinks right now. 

Starbucks has always had secret menu drinks available, but this finally seems to be the beverage that has broken baristas everywhere.

When the drink's existence was revealed and started going viral, baristas all over the internet basically went "HELL NAW". 

And who can blame them?

Here are the instructions to make the drinks according to one Instagrammer: 

"Though your barista might hate you, you have to ask them to mix the matcha and coconut milk together first, add ice and slowly add the traditional pink drink to make this cool ombre effect. Outside of how magical it looks, it also tastes great. And remember to tip your barista! Here's how to make these drinks. Matcha Pink Drink: This is a 3 part Pink Drink (Strawberry acai refresher with coconut milk) and 1 part Matcha Drink (Green tea with coconut milk)! Pink Purple Drink: 1 part Pink Drink (Strawberry acai refresher with coconut milk), 1 part Purple Drink (Passion Ice Tea with Soy milk, vanilla syrup & blackberries)!"

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Let the record show that I feel like an asshole when I even ask for an extra shot in my extremely boring latte. I cannot imagine holding up the entire Starbucks line to get a drink I don't want just because it photographs well. 

Ordering this drink is like essentially telling everyone else waiting in line behind you at Starbucks to eff off. 

I get it, it's cute, it's sparkly, rainbows are awesome, etc. 

But if you want an ombre drink maybe go make one yourself instead of incurring not only the wrath of baristas at your local Starbucks, but every single other caffeine deprived person waiting behind you and sending secret death wishes your way.