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Back to high school we go!
By Aly Walansky — Written on Feb 07, 2017
Ah, the days of high school yore. Frottage, aka dry humping, is essentially grinding (without penetration) against one another with or without clothes on.
"Besides being a little nostalgic, it can be a great way to reconnect with your partner rather than just jumping into your usual routine. The grinding sensation paired with the physical closeness of frottage can promote intimacy and provide all-over stimulation," says We-Vibe's Tristan Weedmark.
The whole body may like pressure, the touch of skin rubbing on skin, and the genitals don’t need intercourse or direct hand or mouth touch to be stimulated.
"Rubbing is a very effective way to enjoy sexual sensations without insertion (so it’s great for virgins, a mostly-safe sex strategy, an excellent escalation of making out)," says sexologist Carol Queen of Good Vibrations.
So, while we wouldn’t say that frottage is hot right now, it has always been hot, as our anatomy is primed to respond to rubbing and grinding on the outside. Here's how to get off using frottage.
1. Touch her stomach.
"The area of the stomach between the belly button may not be a well-known erogenous zone, but it is extremely sensitive and light stimulation of it promotes blood flow to other erogenous zones," says Weedmark.
The lower stomach is dangerously close to the vagina and clitoris that the thought of moving farther is particularly exciting for women.
2. Kiss her wrists.
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The wrists are particularly sensitive because they have thin skin, says Weedmark. For some women, having their wrists kissed or caressed is a huge turn-on.
3. Lightly touch her sacrum.
The sacrum, or lower back, is the small triangle at the bottom of the spinal cord.
"This is where the sacral nerves are located, which shoot down the back to the vagina. Anything from a light touch, rumbly vibrations to a full back massage can be incredibly pleasurable," says Weedmark.
4. Get toys involved.
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"Use your hand or a flat toy beneath your pubic mound so that you benefit from the weight of your body as extra friction," says sexologist Dr. Jess O'Reilly.
5. Don’t focus exclusively on the head of your clitoris.
"Rub your entire vulva, pubic mound, and perineum and grind against various body parts — your hand, your partner’s face, thighs and/or hips," says O'Reilly.
6. Grind during intercourse (with a penis or a strap-on).
Adjust your bodies into a position that allows you to create extra friction against your clitoris.
"You can grind against the base of the penis/dildo or against your partner’s pelvic bone when you’re on top. If you’re in a rear-entry position, you can rub up against your hand, a toy, a pillow or a piece of furniture," says O'Reilly.
7. Practice the kneel and straddle.
"Many people can orgasm this way. Try kneeling over a partner’s lap and grinding on them; if they have a bulge, grind on that! It can also be preferable just to straddle one thigh, since you get somewhat more direct genital contact that way and the legs don’t need to be spread as far apart," says Queen.