5 Questions I Wish I'd Asked Myself Before Falling In Love & Getting Married

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5 Questions To Ask Before Marriage

No regrets... except maybe a few.

I was never into the whole big magical wedding idea. I never imagined myself dressed as a princess, with all my friends and family clapping and crying around me as I walked down the aisle, most likely tripping on the tail of my dress.

Getting married was an important concept to me, but not the most important thing to me, so I really never to the time to figure out which questions to ask before marriage.

There were several things I knew I wanted to accomplish before settling down, but then I fell in love and was too blinded by all the mushy stuff to see that I hadn't yet succeeded in any of my missions.


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​I'm not complaining. The love I share with my husband is solid, We've been through our fair share of rocky times, but we've made it through and we're stronger for it. Still, I can't help but wonder what my life would look like had I done those the things I dreamed of doing before getting hitched and starting a family. 

Before I go into a whole list of things I regret not doing, let me tell you a little about my love story (because who doesn't love a good one of those, right?).

I met my husband through a mutual group of friends. The minute I saw him, I knew he'd be the one I would marry. I know, I know! I hear how that sounds: ridiculous. But, it's true. I just had a feeling. We connected on so many levels, and I knew that there wasn't going to be another man out there that I could tolerate spending all of my time with. I'm selfish, I know. 

We dated for two years, then moved in together on April 1st and got married on May 16th — a quick trip to the justice of the peace and a few signatures on some legal documents and BOOM: Married. 

I worked in an insurance office at the time, and though I was grateful for being employed, it wasn't what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. Have you ever heard little kids saying they want to work in insurance when they get older?​ So I jumped around from office to office, trying to find the perfect fit, much like a spoiled, entitled Goldilocks.

Then I became pregnant with our son, had to quit my job due to health issues, and life has continued to be one long roller-coaster ride.

While I love my son and my husband, I do wish I had taken a few breaths to asked myself these 5 questions before entering a lifetime of marriage.

1. What is it like to live alone?

​I truly believe everyone should have a time in their life when they live alone, not only for the sake of finding their true self, but also in order to learn key lessons of responsibility and accountability.

And so you can dance naked in your living room, of course.


2. What's it like to travel when you're single?

Sad Confession: I've never actually been on an airplane. It's not something I'm necessarily looking forward either, but it is something I've wanted to explore. I've only ever been to a single handful of states, and that's just not cool in my book. I want to go to London, Paris, and Disney World. 

Eventually, I'll travel with my family, but I would have loved to go on some adventures as a single woman!


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3. What would it be like to date a woman?

It wasn't until recently that I realized I'm bisexual. Bi-curious? I hate labels. I just know that I find women attractive, and more than just in a way where I think, "Oh, she's pretty!" It's more like, "I want to have babies with that woman."

I'm happily married to a man and I'm not sure my life would have gone any differently, but who knows? A little experimenting never hurt anyone!


4. Have I established solid friendships?

This is 100 percent my fault. I never solidified any friendships before I became serious with my husband, and because of that, I now have very few friends. I dream of having an all girls night out, but I don't think that's in my future.

Every women I know is in a different place in her life, and unfortunately, none of us has a strong enough common denominator. 


5. Can I make my passion for writing into a real career?

​Though I'm happy with where I am now in my career, I do wish I had started earlier. I was always too tired, too busy, or too unmotivated to pursue my dream or even see it as an actual path I could go down. 

But, everything happens for a reason and I'm here now doing what I love while married to the man I love.

And for that, I am forever grateful!


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Liza Walter is a writer who focuses on current events, pop culture, and true crime. She loves cheese, Game of Thrones, her husband, and son. Not necessarily in that order. You can follow her on Twitter @NerdyLiza.