What Women REALLY Think About When They Masturbate (OMG!)

Dare you not to blush!

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When we think of masturbation, we usually think of guys.

So many comedic images that come to mind — the apple pie, the dirty sock, the too-long showers, the frantically closed laptop. It's as true as it is hilarious ... men do love themselves some masturbation. 

But you know who enjoys masturbation just as much?


I know, so shocking, right? Yes, women masturbate, too!

Men and women are different, and that's as true about the ways they masturbate as it is about everything else! While what men think about when they masturbate is more common knowledge, what fantasies women have in their spank banks seem to be under a cloak of totally sexy mystery. 


So I decided to use my skills as a sex writer to poll as many women as I could and unearth the mystery once and for all: what exactly do women think about when they masturbate

I reached out, and the women of the internet were more than happy to let me know what visions danced in their mast masturbatory heads. 

Here's what I asked:

Okay ladies, what do you REALLY think about when you masturbate? No wrong answer, share as much or as little as you'd like! I wants the dirt! 

And this is what they answered:

  • "Something taboo."
  • "I think about my partner or things I want done to me in bed."

  • "Light bdsm.
  • "Not much, at most I think of foreplay with a really attractive dude which is very unimaginative, but hot and heavy foreplay does great things when you think about it."
  • "I think about the first time I had sex (most of the time). Losing my virginity — unlike many girls — was f*cking AWESOME. I had SO much fun, I was 17, in a CAR in a neighborhood that was under construction, and it was with a guy that I later married. It didn't hurt either (BONUS!). So basically the best sex of my life."


  • "I just watch porn. Have to think for myself enough all day long as it is."
  • "I have to try really hard NOT to think. So I'll masturbate to the most random stuff, like completely unsexy podcasts or audiobooks, or random Netflix stuff. I'm not getting off to it, I'm just letting it soak up enough of my anxiety brain so I don't get sidetracked. Then again, I wank for stress relief, not dating myself or whatever the fuck. No candles, no romance, just endorphins plz kthx."
  • "MMF group sex, double penetration."
  • "Being lightly tortured (BDSM) by a gyno."
  • "Having sex with my man and one other man. But, in my mind, my man is always in charge. It's ultimately about him being dominate and my attention on him (not some cuckold bullshit) but with the added bonus for me of two guys entirely focused on making my body feel good."

  • "For me it's either lesbian porn (specifically tribbing videos, or wrestling ones) or fantasies about being dominated by men. Currently Michael Fassbender has been a primary feature." 
  • "I think of being intimate with some of my more attractive female friends, more specifically, dominating them! I'm submissive with my husband, and am very attracted to women, so it's nice to completely reverse everything!"

  • "I have to watch porn. If I'm not looking at something it's hard for me to be visual and get off. If someone is talking dirty to me or I'm reading some dirty sometimes that works. But as a girl I enjoy and feel like I need porn."


  • "For me it's 50/50: either my mind is totally blank and I'm just focused on feeling, or I'm thinking about an elaborate fantasy I've made up in my mind. I tend to have one fantasy that I repeatedly go back to, until I get tired of it and move on to a new one. It's comparatively rare for me to think about actual sexual encounters I've had in the past, though sometimes if I had some particularly hot sex with my husband the night before, I'll think about that."

  • "Honestly... Sometimes faces... Most of the times it's something along the line of interior design schemes."

I don't know about you, but I'm definitely feeling kind of hot and bothered, right? Some of these fantasies were surprising to me, but GOOD surprising.

Consider them added to my own female masturbation fodder!