Love, Sex

5 Things Same-Sex Couples Just ‘Get’ (That Hetero Ones Don't)

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LGBTQ Lesbian Relationship

Men and women sometimes just don’t understand each other. Even from an early age, often boys hang out with boys and gravitate toward  ... but why? Because they GET it. But when dudes mix with chicks, there’s always that slight gap of disparity in understanding.

The same rings true in relationships. So why force yourself to a future of misunderstanding?

Studies have proven that same- relationships are not only healthier and more communicative, but overall longer-lasting than heterosexual ones.

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​Want to know why? Well check out these 5 reasons same-sex couples work better than their heterosexual counterparts:

1. You can bond over gender-specific issues that someone not your gender would never understand. 

Men’s issues are very different than women’s. The fact that you and your partner in a same-sex relationship can bond over these problems — the way a heterosexual couple couldn’t — is powerful. “It’s easier for a man to understand the experiences of another man,” psychologist Julie Gottman told Politico Magazine, “and a woman to understand the experiences of another woman, than for a man to understand the experiences of another woman, and a woman to understand the experiences of another man.”

Case in point: TAMPONS. We (as men) usually don't get those. Or maybe he says he does (lucky you), but the fact of the matter is that in a same-sex relationship, both people can understand the gender-specific struggles of their other. This in itself creates a mentality of deeper relation and further compatibility.

2. They can get you where you want to be in the bedroom.

Sex. Let’s be real, sometimes your other just doesn’t “push the right button.” In same-sex relationships, there’s a mutual understanding of where the “no-go’s” and the “hell-yeahs!” are. Male and female anatomy are different, but in a same-sex relationship, it’s like you both took the same course and know exactly how to ace the test.

Men know where they want to be touched, women know just how they want to be pleased. In same-sex relationships, you both know how to pleasure your partner because that’s how you like to be pleasured too! Not to mention eliminating the risk of accidental pregnancy. So there’s that.

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3. You can really understand each other on an emotional level.

In a homosexual relationship, you can understand the “why” behind their actions. Not to say that male/female relationships can’t, but when you’re dating someone of your own gender, there’s a solid chance that you both share the same habits.

Example: men tend to like intercourse a lot. Studies show that two men in a relationship are much more apt to get “down and dirty” more often. And beyond that, male homosexual relationships are more commonly polyamorous than others. Why? Because they both get it. It’s physiology. Men by nature crave sex more often, and two men in a relationship can share a mutual understanding that, in a heterosexual relationship, could be mistaken for a secret desire for a tryst.

4. Same-sex relationships also don’t have to worry about pre-determined gender roles.

Man and man, woman and woman, either way, you’re both the same (gender-wise). “If there’s one thing same-sex parents could teach," writer and lecturer Andrew Solomon told the Washington Post, "is that it’s not that one of us is ‘really’ the mom and one is ‘really the Dad. Those are irrelevant concepts. We’re just both in this together.”

Studies show that, since they have more direct styles of communication, that they divide household chores more evenly. Liza Mundy mentioned in an article in Atlantic, The Gay Guide to Wedded Bliss, gay couples tend to be more egalitarian than straight couples. During sex: there’s no “man” or “woman.” There’s a shared level of understanding between the two that just doesn’t exist in heterosexual relationships.

5. You can learn to love and appreciate the parts of yourself by loving the same things in your partner.

Maybe it’s a sexual style you never knew existed. Maybe it’s a means of being understood that you’ve never experienced before. Regardless, dating someone of your same gender opens a doorway to understanding that may not have existed in the past. As stated before, they get you. And you get them. It’s that newfound common ground that creates an inexplicable bond unseen in heterosexual relationships.

So to quote David Letterman: “Who gets the bachelor party?” Both (which is another added bonus.) Think about it. See if you can create this same bond with your significant other, male or female, and see where it takes you.

Relationships (same-sex or not) are work. Hard work. But sometimes, being able to understand your other’s point of view makes the work a little less difficult. 

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