10 Reasons Long-Distance Friends Are The Best Friends

A simple "Hey, hope you're having a good day" from her can actually, cheesily, make your day.

10 Reasons Long-Distance Friends Are The BEST Friends getty

You used to live in the same city and it was awesome. She was always there to throw a party or offer comfort ice cream. Then she announced she was moving: her job, her husband's job, it doesn't matter.

You talked around it. You sneakily asked if there was another way, one that kept her here with you. But things progressed, and one day you found yourself confronted with her spice rack, wondering how you pack a spice rack, and you broke down. But you hid it.


You carried boxes and loaded them in the truck and waved as she drove off. Then you bought yourself a pint of ice cream and cried.

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That's because you didn't know the great secret. You thought you were tight before. You were wrong. You didn't know that a long-distance friendship can actually be the best thing ever, for you and your best friend.

1. She always answers your texts.

She cares about maintaining contact with you, so she doesn't ignore you when you reach out. When you message asking how her day is going, you get back an actual report of what's going on.


You tend to message each other more than you did when she was here in town, maybe even once a day. You talk more long-distance than you did when she lived in the next apartment.

2. She answers your messages for real.

You don't get a "fine, how are you?" answer when you text her. Because she doesn't expect to see you tomorrow or the next day, she tells you like it really is: that she's having a bad hair day and the rain is making it worse, that she had a fight with her boyfriend, that her dog's acting weird again after the move.

It's easier to tell the truth across the miles, and she needs someone from her past who understands her.

3. Then you can tell her that sucks, and launch into the truth about your day.



Want someone to complain to about that giant fight with your husband? A long-distance friendship means your BFF is there for you, and she's not going to tattle to your other besties, because she's thousands of miles away. You have a strict confidante to hold all your secrets, desires, and needs.

You can tell her that you want to kill your children, that your boss is coming onto you, that you feel unfulfilled in your new job. She's there for you, via phone or text. She's going to answer and she's going to care, because she misses you as much as you miss her.

4. A simple "Hey, hope you're having a good day" from her can actually, cheesily, make your day.

You miss her terribly. When you wake up to a sweet message from her, it's like waking up to a little treat someone planned just for you. She might even remember to message you on days when you especially need it, like big dates or performance reviews.

Her remembering you gives you a warm little glow, because you know you're not forgotten, but important enough to be remembered. That makes for an inner hoorah.


5. You're less likely to fight, and if you do, you make up quickly.

There's no social-circle girl drama swirling around your arguments. You can actually fight, just the two of you, and decide to make up on your own time and your own terms. And that will happen quickly, because you both know you don't want to lose each other.

It'll probably come in a text saying "I'm sorry," and you'll send one back saying "me too," and all will be well again.

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6. You can send each other packages.

Nothing's more fun than getting good mail, and good mail means cards and packages. She might pick up a mug she thinks you'll like; you might find some earrings that are especially her. You send each other the raunchiest cards you can find for every single holiday, including Flag Day.

Bonus points if you buy cards, scribble parts of them out, and add your own. "DEAR PRINCESS" becomes "HEY BOO." Defacing Hallmark is way funnier than it has a right to be.

7. You both have a permanent vacation spot.



Road trip! Or, if you can afford airfare, you go out and visit her. You have a place to stay, and you know she'll feed you and take you to all the cool night spots. Any time something comes up that you don't want to do, you can schedule a visit to long-distance BFF.

And when she comes to see you, you have the fun of getting the gang together, but monopolizing her time because she's staying with you. That's social capital for you: take that, other BFF you don't really like!

8. You have a whole other city of boys to visit.

She knows all the cool places to meet guys, and if she doesn't, she's going to find out for you. You get to prowl a whole new city with a whole new crop of hotties and a designated wing-woman. Maybe you'll end up visiting two people when you fly in to see her.

9. It's hard to have the misunderstandings that plague female friendships.

You aren't going to tell her, in a slip of the tongue, that she somehow looks terrible her favorite outfit. Because your interactions are minimized to text and phone (mostly text), you'll have a hard time putting your foot up your behind and saying something stupid that will get misconstrued and start a girl-feud.


This may be the biggest asset of a long-distance friendship.

10. Your friendship is always on your terms.

You have so much more control over a long-distance friendship than one in-person. You decide when to talk to your friend. You decide when to see your friend. You decide what to talk about, how long to talk about it, and what subjects are off limits.

Don't want to talk about the fight with your boyfriend when she asks? It's a lot easier to type "I don't want to talk about it" than it is to say it. You've both got more control over the situation, and that makes for better friends.


Long-distance BFFs rock. They answer your texts, give you a pad to crash in, and send you rad pieces of mail. But mostly, they cared enough to stay your friend when they left you.

You aren't just a fair-weather friend or someone they hang out with because they have to. You're a true-blue friend — you withstood the moving test. And that means the most.

RELATED: 5 Reasons You Need To Spend Time With Your Other Friends (Even If Your Boyfriend Is Your BFF)

Crunchy mama, Ph.D. dropout, and a regular contributor to Scary Mommy, Elizabeth Broadbent writes a column for ADDitude Magazine. Her work has appeared on Today Show Parents, Babble, xoJane, Mamapedia, and Time Magazine Ideas.