Wife Texts Husband All The Hysterical Things He Says In His Sleep

Photo: Ivanko80 / Shutterstock
couple looking at the phone

Do you ever wonder if you talk when you are sleeping? Well, a lot of people do.

Imgur user LongTitlesMakeMeHappy talks in his sleep, but he doesn't say the occasional word here and there. Instead, he makes statements with feeling behind him.

His wife decided to share with him the hilarious things he said while sleeping, and started texting him his sleep talk. And luckily, we've got the funny texts to husband that will crack you up when you hear what he says while asleep.

You have to wonder what the other side of the conversation in his dreams was, and if it was just as funny in sleep context.

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This husband posted the very best texts his wife sent him of what he said while he was sleeping that night. He thought it was so incredibly funny, that it was worth posting.

Good call — his wife really is a teacher.

Who wouldn't want to hang out with Napoleon? You could see if all that short man's complex was true or not.

Of course, there's a Reddit about the best things you've ever heard somebody sleep talk.

These are funny when you're awake, and doubly when you're fast asleep.

You don't want to get involved with illegal shipments, especially illegal shipments of cats.

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Move over, Deepak Chopra. There's a new philosopher in town!

Being Belgian is the only way to go.

Obviously, his wife delights in his sleep talk, which is a very good thing. But how does his wife manage to get any sleep?

Vibey guy stuff? I'd like to see that.

I hate when I have to switch foods in the middle of a meal.

Now that is a nightmare: a bug huge enough to eat cheese.

This guy is quite the sleep-communicator. His sleep talk isn't all gibberish; he's actually forming sentences, making witty comments, and carrying on conversations. 

But his post has started a full discussion about what other people say when they are sleeping.

Another Imgur user responded to his thread, "My gf talks in her sleep. About a month ago she rolled over and said, 'I wish we could've watched the flowers turn into shoes.'"

At least he doesn't freak his wife out like this Imgur user who commented, "How I made my ex freak out one night while half asleep: 'It appears as if he has left.' 'Who has?' 'The guy who was just in the doorway.'"

Honestly, that would have freaked all of us out if our partner said that while they were sleeping.

Thank you, LongTitlesMakeMeHappy and Mrs. LongTitlesMakeMeHappy, for allowing us to get a glimpse of the crazy stuff that's going on in your head while you sleep. 

We'll see you in your dreams.

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Editor's Note: This article was originally posted in January 2016 and was updated with the latest information.

Christine Schoenwald is a writer and performer. She's had articles in The Los Angeles Times, Salon, Bustle, Medium, and Woman's Day. Visit her website or her Instagram.