Self

9 Reasons A Blunt Best Friend Is The Best Type Of Friend To Have

Photo: Roman Samborskyi / Shutterstock
blunt friend shrugging her shoulders

Honesty is among one of the better policies, right up there with the No Child Left Behind Act (in theory) and "Let people off the train before you start getting on it," in terms of general value to society at large.

Yet, we've grown so sensitive to too much, and honestly we need more honesty.

Sure, it can take a bowlful of sugar to make some medicine go down, but a total reluctance to criticize our friends is a disservice to them and ourselves. However, too much "calling it like we see it" quickly turns into a bummer. That's why you need your B.B.F. (blunt best friend) to give you a ride on the straight talk express.

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Here are nine reasons your blunt friend is the best type of friend to have.

1. Your blunt friend doesn't hold back from telling you the truth.

My brother-in-law is famous (in some circles) for saying, "Facts are friendly". But he's wrong; facts are cold, neutral and dispassionate. Your blunt friend should be able to deliver the truth and save the theatrics for shenanigans.

2. They save you from fashion faux pas.

Are you red-green dichromatic and desperately need to know when your colors are clashing? Has your body shape altered significantly since you bought those sweet suede jeans? Do you periodically tuck your skirt into your tights after using the toilet?

Whatever the case may be, your blunt best friend will let you know you need to shape it up, pronto!

3. Blunt friends' observations can be witty and funny.

While my sense of humor tells me silly voices are what make things funny, a mixture of keen observation and dynamite timing does it for most people. Your blunt best friend is a master of the "out of the mouth of babes" style of delivery, even when she doesn't mean to be.

4. They know how to break the ice.

Your painfully candid friend will break the tension by pointing at the elephant in the room and saying, "That's an elephant, y'all!" This generally leads to a conversation regarding what to do about the elephant, or how to escape the pachyderm's tendency to crush and/or gore things.

5. Your best friend can dish it out and take it.

I have three really close friends who are sledgehammer blunt, but only one of them appreciates the same treatment in return. You can surely use your blunt best friend's aversion or affinity to her own medicine to your advantage. A good double-sided back and forth blunt banter can be the balm we all need.

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6. Their compliments are the most meaningful.

When a friend has a reputation for punch-in-the-gut honesty, it can feel like a hot tub full of MDMA massaging your pleasure center when she says, "Awesome work! You're the best." While your blunt friend could still be blowing smoke up your keister, it's far more likely she's being honest. The honesty of her compliment works magic.

7. Your blunt friend has your back when confronting enemies.

Your frank friend (or whatever their name is) will be right there when you need a little ammo for dealing with a rival, frenemy or arch-nemesis.

You are far too nice to counter Ronda's derisive comments about your dating life with the facts.

"Rhonda, your husband sleeps around. And stop laughing Carla! You slept with him, too." Thank you, thank you very much, my painfully honest friend.

8. You know exactly where you stand with them.

I'm not saying this is you, but a lot of women I know have spent at least one night too many lying in bed with the thought, "What the folk did that birch mean by that ship?" Your blunt best friend never leaves any doubt about where you stand, even if you are in deep ship.

9. There's never a dull moment with your brusque buddy.

Yes, you've had to say, "That's not what she meant!" too many times to count, but the old fortune "May you live in interesting times" is both a blessing and a curse. In turn, your blunt besty definitely makes for interesting times, curses be damned.

Listen, radical honesty isn't for everyone, but let's all thank our lucky stars we have a blunt best friend who shoots straight from the hip and doesn't sugarcoat anything other than nuts.

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Tom Miller is a writer and performer based in Los Angeles. He's been a mechanical engineer, a banker, as well as the general manager and coordinating video producer at YourTango