Heartbreak

5 Painfully Harsh Truths About Being The Mistress

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Mistress and her married boyfriend

Dear Other Woman,

This may sound harsh, but you must hear it.

If he's married and he's being intimate with you, you're the other woman. If you're married and he's being intimate with you, that's not fair to your husband. And you might not be the only one he's sleeping with. If he doesn't respect his marriage vows, what makes you think he's going to respect you, and the supposed commitment he made to you as well?

RELATED: 3 Reasons Why A Married Man Will (Probably) Never Leave His Wife

Here are 5 painfully harsh truths about being the mistress:

1. He's likely only using you for what he can get

If you search for the "Player's Rulebook" you'll find things that explain why he does what he does. You may feel like you matter, but he may just be playing you and is unlikely to change — even if you try to change him. Spoiler alert, you're not gonna be able to change him.

   

   

2. Everything he does is actually for him

Does he like to be with you? Or is the relationship just about power?

RELATED: A Little-Known Reason The Other Woman Was Attracted To Your Husband

3. He keeps his responses to you short

Of course, he does — he's trying to leave it open for you to take it how you want. Plus, he has a hard time remembering what he's told you versus his wife. You are not the top priority in his life.

4. He has reasons not to spend time with you

If he liked you, he would find a way to leave his wife and spend all his time with you. He's trying to have his cake and eat it too. You're just a side piece to him, and you feed his ego more than anything.

   

   

RELATED: 7 Deeply Upsetting Lessons I Learned From Being 'The Other Woman'

5. He will cheat on you

If in the rare instance, you get him away from his wife, you're a fool to think he won't start cheating on you like he did her. This normally happens when you cause the wife to leave him. But it's all about the power involved, even though the wife is more attractive.

Be careful with your expectations if you get involved with a married man, and make sure to get out before it gets too messy, or if his wife finds out.

The point is, if you're a female and have found a guy who doesn't have another girl, wants to be around you and wants to pay for stuff, then praise him, and keep him! If you have a good man, but you don't treat him like a king, he will go looking for someone to play with.

RELATED: The Unfiltered Truth Behind Why Married Men Cheat

Alex Alexander is a pseudonym. The author of this article is known to YourTango but is choosing to remain anonymous.