Love, Family

No, Mom: You Should Not Attend Your Daughter's Bachelorette Party

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No, Mom: You Should Not Attend Your Daughter's Bachelorette Party

There’s a growing trend of modern moms expecting to be invited to their daughter’s bachelorette party, or coming up with bachelorette party ideas and then getting to attend. One article interviewed modern moms, some of whom go so far as to even plan their daughter's bachelorette party themselves.

Even though the night is traditionally supposed to be filled with debauchery and sexual imagery, apparently many moms think they should be included in this part of the wedding as well. It's far from your typical mother-daughter relationship.

This is the perfect example of how modern parents suck; they look at their kids as just another part of their social circle. When their kid has a party, they expect to be a part of it, just like any other friend would.

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First off, that's creepy. Bachelorette parties have a certain reputation. Not every party is an ode to debauchery, but that’s generally what people expect when they get the invitation.

Do you think your daughter wants you around when they’re cutting into a penis-shaped cake? These parties are where people do the sort of the stuff they wouldn’t want to do in front of their parents.

The idea behind the party is supposed to be one last night of freedom. That’s not freedom from the relationship, but freedom from responsibility. These parties are about not having to check in with your spouse or confirm plans with them. And you know who's the ultimate symbol of responsibility? You are, Mom.

Sure, you may want to cut loose, too, but it’s not your wedding — it’s your daughter’s. A big part of being a parent is always putting your kid’s needs in front of your own. There are parts of the wedding that are all about the family. The bachelorette party isn’t one of them.

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A lot of the moms interviewed claimed that their daughters could still have fun around them because their mother-daughter relationship was open and honest, and that their atttendance would be okay because they were the "cool" mom.

Here's an FYI: The "cool" mom or dad is never the good mom or dad. They’re always the worst.

One of the other big parts of being a parent is NOT being cool. You don't have to be a jerks, but you do have to discipline your kids. Your kid should feel like they have to be on at least good behavior around you. Being a "cool" mom or dad is a great way to raise a kid that expects to earn participation trophies as an adult.

But ultimately, moms, you shouldn’t even want to go. Part of raising a kid is letting them out into the world when they’re grown up, and this is the ultimate example of you not being able to cut the cord.

You should want your kid to be able to have a life of their own, and your complaints that your daughter didn’t invite you to her wild, alcohol-fueled party just comes across as super-clingy.

Seriously, moms, give your kids their space. Let them go eat their penis-shaped cake. You don’t feel old because you weren’t invited to the bachelorette party; you feel old because you raised a kid who’s now old enough to get married.

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Michael Hollan is a comedian and writer. He's an Associate Producer for video, and a writer, for the New York Post.