Family, Self

Tucker Max Is Married With A KID And 8 More Signs The World's Ending

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Tucker Max

There are some people out there who seem to celebrate how awful they are. They seem to think that being terrible is some sort of accomplishment.

For example, there's Tucker Max. He's the author of I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell and a couple other less successful books. He built a career around going out, getting drunk, treating women terribly, having random sex, and then writing these stories down.

His fan base consists of desperate people who are unable to form personal connections or relationships, and therefore think this behavior is awesome. 

To be fair, he's basically glorifying the sort of life a lot of people expect to live when they go to college. Except, most people grow out of that pretty quickly.

Apparently, Tucker Max has finally reached that point. He's finally settling down and getting married. Also, he has a kid. Let that sink in for a moment.

The guy who glorified the most privileged, obnoxious lifestyle possible is a father. Not a dead beat dad either, but an actual family man. He made a career off of objectifying and then publicly embarrassing countless women, and there's more of him in the world.

After building a career as being the biggest douche possible, this guy found someone who was willing to not just live with him, but also make a baby. Good god.

This is one of those "yeah, this means it's all coming to an end" signs. Basically, this is a sign the world is ending. Don't believe it? Well, here are 8 more examples:

1. Vin Diesel is one of the highest paid actors.

He still goes by the stage name Vin Diesel, and he's also super successful. Forbes listed him as one of the highest paid celebrities of 2015 and now the sun doesn't shine as bright as it used to.


2. Miley Cyrus is hosting the VMAs.

If we had to pick the least obnoxious thing about Miley Cyrus, we'd have to say it's her music. Horrible news! She's going to be hosting this year's Video Music Awards on MTV. That's right, she's going to be given more stage time just to be herself.


3. Pizza Hut created hot dog crust pizza.

When the final trumpet sounds, the gates of heaven will open, and instead of the four horsemen of the apocalypse, there will only be a lone pizza delivery boy. He'll bring death and destruction in the form of a pizza with mini hot dogs baked into the crust.


4. More and more people are getting their news from social media.

In a truly disturbing trend, more and more people are getting their news first from social media. Instead of hearing it from someplace that has any sort of accountability, people are getting their news from random people on the internet, otherwise known as the most biased source possible.


5. Trump is an actual presidential candidate.

Donald Trump won't be president, but he never should've even gotten this far. He should've announced that he was running for president, and then everyone would've a good laugh and then never speak of it again.


6. Bill Cosby is still free.

Based on the sheer number of accusers alone, Cosby should've faced some sort of punishment. But there's also the fact that he's admitted to drugging women. Yet, he's still free. Cosby is out there.


7. Colonel Sanders is back, and he's super creepy.

KFC decided to bring Colonel Sanders back from the dead to be their company's spokesman again. For some reason, they hired comedian Darryl Hammond to play him, and apparently they told him, "Hey, make him as creepy and pervy as possible."


8. Adam Sandler's career just won't die.

Adam Sandler seems like a really nice guy; he just makes some truly awful movies. Yet, they're always successful for some inexplicable reason.

His latest, Pixels, opened to poor reviews and an even poorer box office. Yet, Sandler still has multiples movies still in the works.
Even when audiences try to get rid of him, he's just too powerful.