Self, Sex

Is It Love Or Lust? 2 Questions You MUST Ask To Know For Sure

We've all felt it. The fluttering butteries in your stomach when he walks into the room, the inability to speak, and the loss of breath when you kiss — it seems like actual love. But is there really more to your connection than the physical attraction?  

Biologically speaking, pheromones (that attract you through smell and sight) draw you together. The sexual connection ignites the spark, but do you have the psychological connection to keep it going long-term?

Bjorn Kelly of LiveScience explains, "When it comes to sticking together for the long haul, researchers have shown that likenesses of personality, which can take more time to realize, [means] more." Eric Bressler of McMaster University mentions that "comedy can also help a relationship, but the importance of humor is different for men and women."

Want to know for sure whether it's love or lust?

In the video above, CEO and Founder of YourTango Andrea Miller chats with psychologist and author Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, counselor and therapist Carole H. Spivack, biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher, and Date Like A Grownup founder Bobbi Palmer about the biological factors that contribute to initial attraction.

Here are two questions they say will help you determine whether it's more than lust:

1. Is There A Psychological Connection?

Without a connection through personality, similar interests and sense of humor, it's difficult to find joy spending time together. "Over 60 percent of men and women in America have experienced what you've experienced, that love of first sight, and I think it's because you sit within that love map — within a general constellation of traits that you can almost immediately see," says Dr. Helen Fisher in the video above. Interesting.

2. Will The Chemistry Last?

Even though there may be chemistry, do you see this guy in your future? Sex is wonderful and all, but if there is no intimacy building OUTSIDE the bedroom (like taking a stroll on a nice day while holding hands, deep in conversation), the love won't leave the bed.

Still aren't sure if it's real love? Scroll up to the video above where this incredible expert panel will give you even MORE guidance.