When it comes to dating, Kim Kardashian isn't ready for MENSA just yet.
By Jessica Sager — Written on Oct 18, 2013
Kim Kardashian has had quite a colorful love life: There was Nick Cannon, Damon Thomas, Reggie Bush, Dallas Austin and her 72-day marriage to Kris Humphries. (Fun fact: Their divorce proceedings lasted longer than their marriage.) She seems to have finally settled down with her baby daddy, Kanye West, but that doesn't mean she's learned much about relationships ... at least not based on these love quotes! Check out Kim K's not-so-wise quotes about love, sex, marriage and more.
On her brief, but highly televised marriage to Kris Humphries...
"I think when you know so deep in your heart that you just to listen to your intuition and follow your heart, there's no right or wrong thing to do."
On going beyond a Brazilian wax...
"I am Armenian, so of course I am obsessed with laser hair removal!"
Speaking to Khloe about her down-there beauty standards...
"You have a better, like, looking vagina than I thought."
On her new house...
"It's kind of like my relationship. I'm like nurturing it and like spending a lot of time there and making sure that everything is perfect. It's like my new boyfriend."
On dating athletes...
"Every girl who has dated a football player ... They all have sex the same way."
On batting for the other team, so to speak...
"She [Britney Spears] said she loves me and she loves my butt and how she wants to be my lesbian lover. I mean, what do you say to that other than 'No thanks'? Actually, maybe I would do it for a million bucks."
On robbing the cradle...
"We met the Jonas Brothers. Nick [Jonas] is so cute. I don't think Reggie will get mad because [Nick] is, like, 15. I really shouldn't say he's cute. It's a little inappropriate!"
On being accused of having "Bieber fever"...
"Is that not ridiculous that people thought that Justin Bieber and I were on a vacation together, on a romantic vacation, in the Bahamas, and I just happened to wear a gown as my swimsuit and red lips and he's dressed in a suit in the ocean? Seriously who would walk to the beach like that?"
On bestiality (seriously)...
"So this girl that Jonathan's been friends with for like years? This guy she's dating — Jonathan is convinced that he's f—ing the dog. He said she doesn't want you to come to his place because he probably has posters of like, Lassie and the 101 Dalmatians."
On forgetting that her sex tape is what made her famous in the first place...
"I'm definitely not grateful for that experience. I would say if I had one regret that would be it."
On being called Kanye West's "Perfect b—"...
"I'm honored. I love it. I know he doesn't mean it in a negative way when he says the word 'b—.'"
If you're searching for the best quotes and memes to share with the people you love (or just want to feel inspired yourself) ... look no further! From the sweetest love quotes, inspirational sayings, and hilarious relationship truths, we've got you covered.
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