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Fascinating.
By Jenna Birch — Written on Dec 13, 2020
It's a well-known stigma that married folks or couples in long-term relationships often become complacent in romantic love with their partners. Well, let's finally put a stop that idea.
Shall we find out what turns older men on?
YourTango teamed up with Glo.com and Chemistry.com to conduct a survey of more than 20,000 men and women on one simple yet essential topic: the power of attraction.
We found that even if a couple's heat index waxes and wanes over time, 90 percent believe it can be rekindled long-term.
And as for that age-old stigma about complacency in our comfortable relationships? Guys cited "lack of romantic love" as the turn-off that becomes increasingly repellent as they age.
The desire for romantic love isn't the only thing that shifts for men as they become older and wiser.
Top 10 Turn-Offs for Men
According to these survey results, here are the top ten turn-offs that become increasingly repulsive to men as they age.
1. Lack of romantic love
2. Immaturity/childishness
3. Lack of intelligence
4. Boredom/lack of adventure
5. Narcissism/lack of empathy
6. Lack of drive/ambition
7. Poor personal hygiene
8. Lack of sexual skills
9. Extreme views on religion
10. Racist or prejudice ideologies
What about the other end of the spectrum?
We also asked men which turn-ons have increased in importance as they've aged. Older men are less interested in just the act of sex. They want intimacy, foreplay, and just to slow everything down.
It doesn't have to be fast. This allows for a deeper connection to be formed between the couple.
Also, as men grow older, it takes longer for them to get ready for the big moment. So, erectile issues are something that comes along with age, which makes everything slow down and last a bit longer.
No need to rush your pleasure. And, hey, you never know, he most likely will focus on your pleasure for longer.
Top 10 Turn-Ons for Men
Here are the top ten turn-ons that become more important for men as they grow older.
1. Kindness
2. Communication skills
3. Listening skills
4. Sense of humor
5. Intelligence
6. Sexual prowess
7. Fitness
8. Ambition
9. Smile
10. General body type
So, men most value kindness, being able to communicate well, and having a good laugh as they age. These traits increased in importance for nearly half of men.
Notice how we don't see sexual skills or looks make an appearance in turn-ons until much further down the list. That's pretty good news for both men and women.
Editor's Note: This article was originally posted in May 2011 and was updated with the latest information.
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Jenna Birch is a freelance journalist for women’s magazines and national websites, strategist, and author of 'The Love Gap: A Radical Plan to Win in Life and Love'. Visit her website for more of her work.