People Who Are Mentally & Emotionally Draining Usually Complain About 6 Things Almost Constantly
MAYA LAB / Shutterstock Mentally and emotionally draining people are some of the worst to be around. It might sound a little dramatic to hear them called "energy vampires" but if you've ever spent time with one, you know how accurate it feels.
They've got a complaint for pretty much everything and seemingly endless needs. Time with them can turn a pleasant day into something very sour the moment they open their mouths. To spot one, watch for the topics they love to complain about most.
Mentally and emotionally draining people complain about 6 things almost constantly:
1. Things not being up to their standards
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People who drain those around them can't help but complain about the smallest shortcomings of everything and everyone around them. Maybe it's a meal that doesn't satisfy their perfect vision of what they wanted or a concert that everyone else had fun at but they thought was accoustically imperfect, they are just not going to let it go.
Listen, life is already filled with tons of disappointment for pretty much everyone. But when you're draining to others, you think it's only happening to you so you have to constantly point it out. Instead of focusing on what goes right, draining people draw misery out of every experience.
We should all strive to lift the people around us up instead of tearing them down into our own misery. However, people like this just can't help it.
2. Not being the center of attention
These people genuinely love being the center of attention, wanting everyone within earshot to know what they have to say about something. If they notice that other people aren't listening, they're going to get desperate for attention and start complaining, wondering why no one wants to pay them any mind.
The truth of the matter is, it's really not always about you. People are busy with their own lives or what's going on inside their heads and it's nothing to take personally. Complaining about not being the center of attention is really just going to suck the spirit out of the room.
3. Being held accountable for their actions
Mentally and emotionally draining people rarely know how to take accountability. Instead, they oassume the role of the victim when they get called out for their harmful actions. They'd rather let the whole world know that they're being wrongfully accused and cause a distraction than ever admit fault.
They often complain about everyone being out to get them, and at first people believe them. Over time, however, it's clear that they're just not strong enough to say "sorry" at a basic, human lvel.
4. Their generosity being taken for granted
Being a generous person is a generally good trait. Honestly, we can all stand to give more to others most of the time. However, when it comes to emotionally draining people, they give to others only to get something in return. When they don't get what they were expecting, they'll often complain about feeling taken for granted.
No one wants to be around this energy. When a person does something kind for someone else or goes above and beyond, they shouldn't expect other people to follow suit immediately. It doesn't take long until people wise up and distance themselves.
5. Blaming others for how bored and uninspired they feel
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We all have moments where we just feel like we're in a slump. We just can't seem to find anything interesting to occupy our time and inspiration feels like a totally foreign concept. But instead of doing something about it, mentally and emotionally draining people complain and find someone else to blame for it.
Obviously it's OK to vent to people about what you're struggling with, but to constantly complain about being bored and uninspired without seeking out anything to remedy it is so draining to have to listen to. It's even worse when you're the person being told you're to blame for the draining person's boredom.
6. A specific person or people in their life
Last but certainly not least, and possibly one of the most draining thing that these people do, is complain about a specific person or group of people in their life who are ruining everything or the root of every single problem. Sometimes it's their romantic partner (the one who literally never changes), their friend group, or even their family.
Regardless of who, they're constantly complaining about people who are supposed to be there to support them. They don't see that excusing the cheater's cheating time and again is the reason the person keeps cheating, for example. They don't see that keeping unhealthy friends around is the reason they have unhealthy friends! All they see is that things should be better, and they want someone else to solve the problem.
Again, it's totally normal to want vent every now and then about the people in our lives who frustrate us. But to endlessly complain about them without either having a conversation with the person directly or just plainly cutting them out of your life makes you wonder why they keep sticking around.
But emotionally and mentally draining people seem to love having someone to complain about. And worst of all? When you're close with one of these draining people, you're faced with the reality that someday you, too, will probably be the one they love to complain about.
Luke Aliga is a writer with a degree in Technical Writing and Communication who covers relationships, culture, and human-interest topics.
