5 Sweet Ways Your Cat Tells You They Love You
Cats are notoriously hard to read, but not if you know the signs to watch for!
Kichigin | Canva Pro Cats are pretty notoriously hard to read. Who among us hasn't fallen prey to that old gambit where they roll on their back for a belly rub, then bite you the minute you touch them? Their mercurial, elusive nature is part of what makes many cat people love them so much.
But it can also be a bit nerve-wracking, especially if you're the type who's more used to dogs' more effusive affection. So, how can you tell if a cat likes you or is silently considering pouncing for your jugular? It turns out there are some easy-to-read signs if you know what to look for.
5 ways your cat says I love you, according to a professional cat behaviorist:
Amanda Campion is a U.K.-based clinical animal behaviorist who has spent more than 30 years working with animals, especially cats, as a trainer and rehabilitation specialist, and has a specialty for helping traumatized and anxious cats adapt to their new families and homes through her cutely named company KittySitty.
In a recent video, she shared that there are five key ways cats show love that are easily missed by owners and often give the impression that a cat is ignoring their person. Fret not, cat lovers, they're probably just being characteristically subtle about it!
1. Slow blinking
To us humans, it looks like regular old blinking, or maybe that a cat is feeling a bit sleepy. But it actually speaks volumes more than that. "If your cat slow blinks at you, try slow blinking back," Campion recommended. "It's a sign that they love you, and it's their cat communication of trust and affection."
Studies have also found that this works in the other direction, too. When humans mimic slow blinking at a cat, they tend to receive the message that the person is friend rather than foe, even if the person is a stranger in some cases. I tried this once while cat-sitting a particularly skittish and unfriendly cat, and while it took a few days, it did work!
2. Head-butting
"That lovely little boop that they give you, it's adorable and it's their way of showing affection," Campion said. But it's more than just an "I love you." It's a way for your cat to mark you as theirs, and vice versa, by exchanging scents.
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Cats do head-butting to each other as well, because they have scent glands on their heads that they use to mark territory and establish social bonds. So if they do it to their human, "you are officially being claimed as theirs," Campion said. And they will be sure to remind you exactly who belongs to whom once it's time for their food bowl to be filled.
3. They bring you gifts
Sometimes it's something like a sock or a toy. Others it's… well, a dead bug or even worse, a dead bird. Regardless, they're not just being weird or gross. They're wooing you in their odd little feline way!
"That is their way of sharing with you, and it's demonstrating affection and that you are part of their family," Campion says. Never has a dead bird meant so much.
4. Sleeping with you
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Sleep is pretty much any animal's most dangerous time of day, because if they were in the wild, that's when their predators would most likely attack — it's easier to catch sleeping prey than a cat running around hunting birds, of course.
So if a cat is willing to sleep with you, it's a huge sign of trust. "They're extremely vulnerable," Campion says, "so if they're sharing that time with you, they feel protected and safe and they love you."
5. The tail wrap
Cats use their tails to communicate all sorts of things, from curiosity to aggression. Intertwining them together is one way they show social bonds to other cats, and they use it to signify similar things with humans, too.
Similar to head-butting, cats also have scent glands on their tails, so it's another way for them to put a little marker on their human. "It's a sign of affection," Campion says, "and it's the cat equivalent of holding hands."
Just be careful returning the handshake: Even if they use them to show affection, cats tend not to like their tails grabbed. Hey, emotional inconsistency is part of their charm!
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.
