People Who Can't Pretend To Be Interested In Small Talk Usually Say 8 Phrases In Conversation
Вячеслав Ткачёв | Pexels We underestimate how much we'll enjoy small talk, even about topics we perceive as boring.
But some people still find small talk draining. They yearn for depth and vulnerability, so it's hard for them to pretend to be interested in superficial conversations. And when it's with someone they have no interest in getting to know, their words quickly give them away.
Phrases people who can't pretend to be interested in small talk often say
1. 'I'm really busy right now'
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People who can't stand small talk often use phrases like "I'm really busy right now" or "I'd love to talk, but" as escape routes. For most people, conversations rarely end when they want them to, but when someone can't hide their disinterest, they use excuses and set boundaries.
They're not afraid to tell a little white lie or throw someone else under the bus to get out of a conversation. It's their time and well-being at stake when they're stuck in a surface-level interaction.
2. 'That's interesting'
It's much less the words themselves, but all the nonverbal cues and tones of voice that come with a phrase like this immediately give away an unsatisfied person. Rather than asking thoughtful questions that make conversations deeper or make someone feel valued, these people convey their disinterest with comments like this one.
For an intelligent, socially aware person, these phrases come after unrealized attempts to create a deeper connection. Maybe it's clear this person only wants to talk about themselves. Maybe they don't like the energy of a conversation enough to try.
Either way, they're clearly not interested in keeping the conversation going and are using these phrases as an excuse to walk away.
3. 'Sorry, I'm getting a phone call'
For some people, the simple presence of someone's phone in a conversation is enough to be a distraction. But for someone trying to get out of small talk, relying on their phone is the perfect solution.
Whether they're getting a phone call or not, the urgency of an incoming phone call gives a quick escape route out of a conversation that feels like it may never end on its own.
4. 'Now isn't a great time'
When we make good excuses, where there's both accountability and some layer of honesty, we often protect ourselves and others. "Now isn't a great time" or "I'm tired" don't allow us to sidestep accountability, but in a low-stakes conversation, that kind of honesty can protect people's feelings.
Even if they're not interested in a conversation, other people feel less personally offended by a phrase like this, rather than "I'm bored of this conversation" or "I don't want to talk to you."
5. 'Let's chat another time'
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Even if they have no interest in coming back to a conversation or a person again, people trying to remove themselves from annoying small talk may use "let's chat another time." Instead of saying "I don't want to have this conversation," they delay it, giving themselves an out.
We've all been on the other end of a phrase like this, and it doesn't usually bring up the feelings of rejection that a more blunt end to a conversation does. We feel considered, even if we're the ones rambling on and leaning into small talk that's not making anyone feel fulfilled.
6. 'Thanks for the chat'
Sometimes, expressing gratitude for a conversation or for someone's presence is the perfect way to step away from small talk. If you're not interested in hurting someone's feelings or making them feel unheard, appreciating their company is the easiest way to end an unfulfilling chat.
We all have a fundamental desire to feel like we belong. So, even for someone you're not interested in speaking with or getting to know, creating a temporary sense of belonging can make leaving that conversation a lot easier.
7. 'Anyway'
"Anyway, this was nice" or "Anyway, I'm headed out" are perfect cues to someone that you're ready to end a conversation.
If it doesn't feel like someone will ever stop asking questions or talking about themselves, we need this phrase, usually paired with a sigh or a break in eye contact, to signal comfortable disinterest. It can be a deflection and even an end if it's used correctly.
8. 'I'm not sure what else to say'
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Honesty is the best policy, even in this kind of way, for someone who's really not interested in continuing a conversation. "I don't know what to say" can create a natural ending for small talk, and it's completely honest.
If you're around someone who's not asking questions or clearly isn't meshing well with you, it's the perfect escape. Maybe it will prompt a question or topic that draws them back in, but for people disinterested in small talk, it's how they avoid pretending to be interested in that conversation.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
