Emotionally Intelligent People Usually Say 5 Phrases When Someone's Trying To Get Them To Gossip

It's awkward when people gossip around you. While it's normal to feel this way, especially if you don't want to be rude, the most emotionally intelligent people use their words to avoid this situation. They won't let anyone force them to speak ill about anyone else.

Emotionally intelligent people use these phrases when someone wants them to gossip

1. 'It's not my story to tell'

woman telling her colleague she won't gossip saying that's not my story to tell Getty Images Signature via Canva

This phrase certainly gets the point across, though it can be awkward in the moment. When somebody is trying to pry information out of you about somebody else, emotionally intelligent people don't let them.

Though gossiping is a great way for people to bond with others and build connections, it can turn nasty very quickly. So, if someone is asking them to gossip, empathetic people shut it down.

2. 'You would get a better picture if you ask them directly'

Gossiping is human nature, but it can also be used as a ploy to be mean to others. When people are gossiping about you, it's not fun and can really be hurtful.

For example, if word gets back to you that your friends were gossiping about you behind your back, it can not only damage the friendship but your self-esteem. It can also damage your physical and mental health.

So, emotionally intelligent people avoid this situation altogether by saying "just ask them" or "you would have a better understanding if you ask them directly." They're extremely careful around people who put them in situations like this. They know there's a thin line between hurting someone's feelings and just trying to vent about a person.

3. 'They would know best'

A phrase like "they would know best" doesn't have to shame the person asking their friend or family member to gossip with them. Instead, it allows them to play it off like they really don't know anything about the subject.

The truth is, the other person actually would know best. And if they don't feel like explaining themselves, then that's how it is.

Because of their emotional intelligence, people who avoid gossip in this way fully understand how negative comments can impact someone. They're self-aware and empathetic, and they don't want to feel responsible for making another person feel bad.

4. 'The game of telephone rarely ends well for me'

woman telling colleague she's not gossiping saying telephone rarely ends well MangoStar_Studio from Getty Images via Canva

We all remember playing telephone as kids, and gossiping as adults is basically the same thing. When one person gives their account of a story and they tell another person, details get lost. Usually, the story doesn't even end up being the same after it's been repeated and passed on so many times.

So, it's very traumatizing for people when others gossip about them and those lies end up being spun. For emotionally intelligent people, they don't let it get to this point. By admitting that they understand how a game of telephone ends, they're letting the other person know they're completely uncomfortable.

5. 'I'm not sure'

By saying "I'm not sure," it's a great way to get out of gossiping. If somebody is asking you what happened to someone close to you, it's an easy response. If they're being peer pressured, they also won't give in or reveal details.

Even if they do know the truth, someone with high emotional intelligence is comfortable hiding it because of their above-average empathy. They also aren't going to make assumptions about how someone is feeling.

Instead of being complicit in the gossip, they're essentially saying they're not interested in talking about that person. They remain neutral and they won't budge.

Sophie Bagheri is a writer with a bachelor's degree in English and theatre who covers lifestyle topics.