Once You Notice These 4 Habits In Someone, Their Fake Confidence Becomes Impossible To Unsee
Christiyana Krüger | Pexels At first, it's easy to be impressed by someone who seems confident. They usually speak loudly and seem totally sure of themselves. But then one day, you notice a few subtle habits and suddenly their performance of fake confidence becomes obvious, and once you see it, you can't unsee it.
Once you notice these four habits in someone, their fake confidence becomes impossible to unsee:
1. They struggle to identify their true voice
It is important to learn the difference between the voice of your inner critic and the voice of your true self. Your inner critic is loud and harsh. It is impatient and mean. Meanwhile, the voice of your true self is quiet, strong, and patient. With practice, you will learn to notice which voice is speaking to you. People with fake confidence struggle to discern the difference.
Life coach Moreah Vestan suggested, "Have a friend or two who's on your side to converse with when you need an outside perspective. If you feel more peaceful when you hear their encouragement, connect with them when their support keeps you on track."
2. They ignore the signs their body sends them
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Your body is wise. It will rarely lie to you. When you notice your inner critic speaking, pay attention to the sensations in your body. Often, your body will give you the first signal that your inner critic is at work.
You might feel tension in parts of your body. Your jaw may feel tight, and your throat might feel constricted. You may feel butterflies in your stomach. The tone of your voice may change, and your chest may feel heavy.
When you start feeling tension in your body, people with fake confidence often struggle to discern what is going on. Your body is wise and wants you to pay attention to something that is out of sync. When your true self is speaking, you will feel peace in your body. Your muscles will feel calm and relaxed.
3. They can't quiet their thoughts
You have a wise mind. You are at your best when your mind is quiet. When your inner critic wants to wreak havoc, it sends your mind into unstable thinking and negative self-talk. Your inner critic will do its best to create enough chaos to prevent you from trying anything new.
People with fake confidence struggle to quiet their minds, but there are ways around it. You can quiet that negative voice by learning to relax your mind. Research found that when you quiet your mind, your inner critic will eventually give up. There are many practices to help you quiet your mind.
- Mindfulness
- Centering prayer
- Yoga
- Tai chi
- Walking
- Music
- Gardening
Find a practice (or several) that works for you.
4. They avoid their true selves
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The good news is that you have all the wisdom you need within you. Your higher self knows best what you need. The voice of your higher self will keep inviting you to listen. It will never attack or put you down. For those who are religious or spiritual, you can call your higher self your "spirit self" or "God-self."
When you follow your higher self, you are going to find greater joy, meaning, purpose, and satisfaction in life. Finding the voice of your true self doesn’t mean your life is going to be easy, but it does mean you are more likely to feel self-assured. You will inwardly know what you need to do in each moment of your life.
"Self-confidence is fragile," life coach María Tomás-Keegan reminded us. "The more you allow degrading thoughts to play around in your head, the more you believe they're right. Thoughts are not facts. They come from your subconscious, where your memories of experiences, beliefs, and fears live."
The voice of your higher self will speak to you through your body, heart, and mind. The more open you are to your three energy centers, the better you will be able to move through the ups and downs of life.
Roland Legge is an author, certified spiritual life coach, and teacher of the Enneagram. He helps people connect to their inner selves and find alignment with their highest purpose and values.
