Men With A Specific Type Of Job & Hobbies Make The Best Dads, According To A Baby Nurse
Standret | Shutterstock What makes a good dad? According to nurse Kara Thompson, there's a very specific type of man with very defined interests that is a neon sign for her of a good dad, and it has nothing to do with earning potential or swagger.
Thompson has worked as a mother-baby nurse for five years, providing postpartum care to moms and their newborns. She not only gives moms practical guidance for how to navigate their new lives with a baby, but she also offers emotional support. When it comes to parenting, she's seen all types, and guys who are engaged and involved with their wives and their pregnancies are the ones who make the best dads. But she takes it one step further, insisting that a specific job and hobbies tell her without ever meeting a man of his parenting abilities.
Thompson explained that men with nerd jobs & hobbies make the best dads.
She shared her perspective on who makes a great father, saying, “I don’t think it has to do with, like, looks or build necessarily. It comes down to what they do for work and their hobbies.”
Thompson believes that being a nerd translates into being a present and supportive partner, before, during, and after birth.
“The nerds — if they are a computer science person, if they play Dungeons and Dragons, if they read, if they’re the kind of guy who would sign you up for things, like events together… like a candle-making class, they’re gonna be the kind of guy who’s like, ‘We should sign up for a birth class,’” she explained.
Fathers-to-be who get involved in all parts of the process, from pregnancy and beyond, are men who are willing to put themselves in a new environment. They understand how crucial providing support is, and they do so with joy and excitement.
Nerds are dedicated, thoughtful, and passionate, which are all aspects of being a present and committed parent.
Nerds are smart about very niche things. They might be socially awkward in certain situations, but ultimately, they don’t care what other people think about them. They’re content to show up as their most authentic selves, and that’s what makes them cool.
“If you got yourself a nerd, and you’re like, ‘I don’t know if they’d be a good baby daddy,’ they’re probably gonna be a good baby daddy,” Thompson concluded.
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While pregnancy and postpartum care are often viewed by society as belonging firmly within the realm of women’s work, Thompson argued it's a harmful myth.
Having a baby is a truly life-changing event. Giving birth affects every mom’s body in different ways, but the common thread is that labor is, well, labor, and after going through it, moms need time and support to heal fully.
The adjustment period in the newborn phase can be extremely hard. You’re running on only a few hours of interrupted sleep while tending to the urgent needs of a tiny, adorable, yet fully helpless baby.
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Having a supportive partner, one who brings you water and snacks while you’re feeding the baby, one who does diaper changes and burp sessions and understands the full intensity of new motherhood, is more valuable than anything else.
Thompson created an 8-part series focused solely on how non-birthing partners can be supportive when the time comes to bring their baby earthside.
Her list of how to be the best partner to a birthing parent included practical suggestions, like helping them change positions, bringing them ice chips, and giving massages. She also reminded them that each contraction brings the baby closer to being born.
Thompson shared her own experience of receiving support during labor, describing how her husband “applied sacral pressure 24 hours when I was in labor and never left my side.” Adding, “Literally, being an amazing [and] supportive birth partner is such a turn-on.”
In a world that defines manhood according to extremely rigid and ultimately damaging terms, going against the grain and being gentle, vulnerable, and available is the way to win hearts.
Alexandra Blogier, MFA, is a writer who covers psychology, social issues, relationships, self-help topics, and human interest stories.
