Husband Calls Wife ‘Mean’ For Suggesting He Brush His Teeth More Than Once A Month
She admitted that his bad breath is getting out of control.
Furkan Sağlam from diversifylens | Canva A wife admitted that she's fed up with her husband's lack of personal hygiene, despite his grievance that her requests to change his bad habit are mean. Sharing her story with Slate's "Dear Prudence" advice column, she claimed that she and her husband have been together for a good number of years, and while their marriage is filled with love, she simply can't get over the fact that he's not consistent with brushing his teeth.
A husband called his wife 'mean' for asking him to brush his teeth more than once a month.
"My husband and I have been together for over five years now. I love him with all my being, but there is just one huge issue I have with him: His breath smells horrible. I’ve tried both being nice and being blunt about it with him, but it just never really sinks in," she began.
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She said she's tried everything, but he simply accuses her of being "mean" to him, despite the fact that she clearly just wants him to change his brushing habits. She said her husband grew up in a house where both of his parents had really bad teeth and never made it a priority to take care of their oral hygiene.
She estimated that her husband probably brushes his teeth at least once a month. She first realized what his routine was when they started dating, but it's now gotten to the point where she can't stand to be around him anymore.
The wife is hoping her husband changes his bad habit before it impacts their daughter.
"We recently had a baby and her teeth are due soon to be popping out. How can I make him realize that she will be seeing his lack of oral hygiene and may think it’s OK, when it’s really not?" she questioned. "Is there a way I can show him this is not only hurting his own health, but could possibly hurt his child’s way of thinking when it comes to her teeth?"
Brushing your teeth isn't just something that you can do when you feel like it. It's imperative to not only maintain your gum health but also your overall health. These are all the teeth that we'll ever have... unless you're willing to pay thousands for veneers.
Research has shown that regular tooth-brushing is "sufficient to maintain oral health and to prevent cavities and periodontal diseases." That's a pretty simple requirement. More important than that, however, would be maintaining pleasant hygiene so your nearest and dearest aren't repelled by the foul odors.
There really shouldn't have to be any hand-holding involved with getting this woman's husband to actually care about the teeth in his head and brush them twice daily. While his childhood might be an explanation for why he's inconsistent about brushing his teeth, it isn't an excuse, considering he's now a full-grown adult with a family of his own.
The wife was advised to do some research about dentists who specialize in taking care of 'scared' patients.
In response to her dilemma, Emily Yoffe, the advice columnist for "Dear Prudence," explained that there are dentists out there who work closely with patients who might have a fear of getting their teeth looked after and cleaned.
"You should research some who specialize in scared patients and who might even put someone in a twilight state during cleaning and other procedures. You should also show him some information about how parents with dental cavities can pass those germs onto their babies through kissing," Yoffe advised.
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There is also the possibility that there are some undiagnosed mental health issues at play. According to GQ, men choosing not to brush has become somewhat of a symptom of depression. One reader told the outlet, “When I was going through some pretty rough spots a couple years ago, I wouldn’t even shower, let alone brush my teeth, for days at a time,” said Colin, 29, from Brooklyn.
It certainly wouldn't hurt for his wife to have a discussion with her husband that was void of accusation or even criticism. Perhaps that would be the first step in finding a solution or at least uncovering the root cause of his aversion to brushing.
At the end of the day, her husband should, realistically, be the person who is responsible for his own health, especially when he's more than capable of doing so. So, unfortunately, she'll either have to find a solution that works for them both or she'll have to continue smelling his bad breath.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
