Self

How To Spot A Narcissist Just Based On Their Energy

Photo: Tony Marturano / Shutterstock
mysterious man

If you're wondering how to spot a narcissist in your social circle, you can start by looking at their personality traits. It turns out that signs of narcissism can pop up in a person's energy too. 

There are a lot of articles on the internet about narcissists.

With a little Googling, we can learn some of the characteristics of a narcissist and come to the realization that being narcissistic is a personality disorder.

Here are some examples from the Mayo Clinic.  A narcissist...

  • Has an exaggerated sense of self-importance
  • Expects to be recognized as superior even without achievements that warrant it
  • Exaggerates achievements and talents
  • Is preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, brilliance, beauty, or the perfect mate
  • Believes that he/she is superior and can only be understood by or associated with equally special people
  • Requires constant admiration
  • Has a sense of entitlement.

If you are in contact with a narcissist, I'm sure you could add a few definitions of your own to this list.

RELATED: The 8 Confusing Stages Of Falling In Love With A Narcissist

What about the narcissist's Energy?

If you want to avoid getting involved with a narcissist or recognize one in your family group or circle of friends, in my experience this is how narcissistic energy manifests.

The first thing to understand is that if you agree to regularly connect with a narcissist, you may end up becoming 'narcissistic supply'.

Yes, just like a drug dealer.

That means in terms of energetics quite literally, you give and the narcissist takes.

Initially, it may not seem that way.  If you are in an intimate relationship or close friendship with a narcissist, you may be having a blast and be feeling wonderful, since this person is giving you so much attention, praise, and connection.  It's amazing!  Just what you had always dreamed of.

And once you are emotionally (and energetically) connected, the tables will start to turn and the flow of energy will switch.

The 'glow' you felt at the beginning of your connection will be a vague memory, unless, that is, the narcissist feels your attention waning, in which case he/she will switch the headlights back on in your direction to top you up with some glamor love to get you back online.

RELATED: 5 Reasons It's So Hard To Spot A Narcissist Until It's Too Late (And 5 Red Flags To Look Out For)

The energetic difference between a narcissist and you

The difference is, quite often, that a narcissist gets their vital force, energy, 'chi', whatever you want to call it, from others. I know it sounds a bit scary, but the upside is they can only ever get it from you with your agreement.

If you have a regular spiritual practice and connect with g-d, the Greater Than Self, group consciousness, and Gaia or put your word here _____________ then you won't need to get your vital force from anyone else in a body, and nor would you want to.

Were you a compassionate witness, or know someone who was in your life?

Your compassionate witness may have been silent, but they saw how you were mistreated and knew it was wrong.  A compassionate witness can be a parent or sibling who was aware of the mistreatment you suffered but was unable to stop it.

You felt this growing up, and as a result, became aware that there was a different universe out there waiting for you than the picture the narcissist painted in your mind.

When a narcissist is created through family trauma they had no one present to witness their suffering, so the person came to believe that this behavior was natural and normal and that it's OK to treat others the same way.

This results in what is termed 'the narcissistic wound', an essential break or disruption in the person's energy.

The end result of this essential wound is that a person's own energy flow is broken between the growth of their child self and their adult self. This, in turn, shuts down the growth of the inner world.  As individuals grow, they will become aware that they are suffering from an energy deficit.

To survive, the individual learns to put out energetic feelers into others' energy fields to draw on the energy they cannot contact in their own world, to make themselves feel better.

So, can you feel when your energy is being taken?  That is one way to identify a narcissist.

RELATED: 3 Ways To Know For Sure That You're Dating A Man With Narcissistic Personality Disorder

Sarah Lawrence is an Akashic records reader and spiritual coach.  Check out her writiing at Mom On A Spiritual Journey.

This article was originally published at Sarah Lawrence at New World Energetics. Reprinted with permission from the author.