10 Tiny Habits That Make You Immune From Disrespect

Photo: Matheus Bertelli | Canva
Woman standing tall, listening surrounded by peers

I grew up learning to deal with the sting of disrespect from others. I believed I was the kind of person for whom disrespect was a part of life. Then, I learned about human behavior and found I could adapt my behavior to encourage deeper self-respect, diminishing the lack of respect I received from others. Here are some little shifts in behavior that work:

Here are 10 tiny habits that make you immune from disrespect:

1. Developing consistency in something that matters

It’s so easy to allow the modern world and all its variety to pull you in new directions continually. Unfortunately, beyond brushing your teeth every day, this means we don’t allow worthy actions to grow. Find something to be consistent in that sits at the heart of your work. For me, it’s writing. Your confidence will grow wings on the back of consistency.

2. Having a strong posture

Sit up a fraction. Walk like the King of England just said you have something special about you. Do this even if you feel nervous worms wriggling in your tummy. Posture defines self-image. Others will sense it and you will begin to respond to it.

10 Tiny Behaviors That Make You Immune From DisrespectPhoto: Pixel-Shot / Shutterstock

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3. Making someone else’s life easier

People are rushed and stressed. Most secretly want to be led and for someone to show up and make them feel better, less stressed, and more important. Be that person.

4. Give yourself time to think by slowing down

You can tell when someone’s jumping to conclusions and finding it difficult to think. They are moving and thinking too fast. They make life harder for themselves by rushing. Instead, slow down physically, and the mind will decelerate.

5. Rarely speaking about yourself

Hold off on yacking off about your struggles and achievements for now. Leave space for others to fill in the gaps. This cultivates an air of mysteriousness in you that people will want to understand. Lacking what most have — self-obsession — is refreshing.   



6. Not adapting your behavior to impress

Most people are dead set on looking cool, funny, impressive, and free of blemishes. So they adapt their behavior to try to look better. This often comes across as inauthentic and a little icky. Forget about trying to impress people. Instead, focus on maintaining a relaxed harmony.

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7. Being OK with what is

You’ll be in the top 2% by doing only this. Whatever the heck happens to you today, find a way to relax in the face of it. It didn’t turn out as planned. Big whoop. No need to cry about it for hours. Cultivate an OKness with what is.

8. Not relying on external approval for happiness

It’s extraordinary how many humble humans have fallen into the trap of believing there is a connection between our inner joy and external approval. This is silly sauce. It explains many interpersonal problems and insecurities. There is no connection here — you are happy by default. Living like you know this for a fact will instill confidence and disarm any tension in your relationships.

RELATED: I Am Not What Others Think Of Me: My Journey To Acceptance

9. Cultivating calm over reactivity

Being hot-headed and quick to react when triggered brings zero admiration. Learn to breathe when you feel a rising rage. What’s the alternative? Years of regret and potential injury to yourself and others? Don’t be a bozo. There’s nothing valiant about overreacting.

10. Seeing the humor where appropriate

I was reading an article about how humor was developed in humans and even other animals like chimps as an important social dynamic. We need humor to soothe life’s difficulties and to deepen connections. Be light-hearted in the face of challenges, and you become the architect of a happier, more creative life.

RELATED: 6 Ways To Get The Respect You Deserve

Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps you build a money-making personal brand with your knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient. 

This article was originally published at Medium. Reprinted with permission from the author.