8 Everyday Things That Completely Exhaust & Annoy Highly Intelligent People
Hector Pertuz | Shutterstock The kinds of things the average person entertains and enjoys couldn’t be more different than their high IQ peers. In fact, many of the everyday things they love actually annoy their usually-intelligent friends.
These high IQ friends are naturally curious and willing to step outside their comfort zones, but there are still some otherwise harmless things that immediately drain their social battery.
Highly intelligent people are exhausted and annoyed by these 8 everyday things:
1. Endless small talk
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Most intelligent people are naturally prosocial and understand that to build a healthy connection, you have to start with empathy. Sometimes that means they need to entertain small talk and get to know someone on a more superficial level than they’d prefer.
However, when small talk feels completely meaningless with someone they’re not interested in knowing or draining in an overstimulating environment, it’s not a priority. They crave deeper connection, but if someone isn’t even giving them their full attention in a low-stakes environment, it’s easily annoying.
2. Overly rigid work meetings
Many smart people aren’t afraid to challenge their own beliefs and to take on new approaches to complicated problems once they see evidence of a better way to do things. They enjoy the kinds of complicated discussions and collaborations that the workplace offers, even if they’re completely exhausting and draining for the average employee.
However, when there’s little room for nuance and a very clear “right” answer to a problem they’re trying to solve in a work meeting, these kinds of conversations can be more than boring. They’re the ones zoning out in conversations and doing independent work, because the meetings are nothing short of understimulating.
3. Loud public spaces and events
Many people who struggle with conversational etiquette and deeper conversations feel relieved when they’re in a crowded public space. They don’t have to entertain a deep conversation or worry about keeping small talk going, because they can use a loud environment or a crowded party as an excuse.
However, these environments are not only more overstimulating for a high-IQ person, they also remove the ability for them to entertain deep conversations. They’re naturally curious people who want to ask questions and get to know people on a deeper level, but these spaces remove their ability to do so.
4. Unnecessary competition
Many intelligent people are self-aware because they’re not afraid to go deeper and reflect on their own strengths and weaknesses. However, when they’re in overly competitive environments where they’re pressured to prove their intelligence or be perfect and not make mistakes, it can hinder their curiosity and make them hesitant to take chances.
If they’re worried about perfectionism, they’re drained. Worse, they also don’t have any opportunities to truly connect with people or solve a problem without subtle competition taking over their interactions. It's exhausting and frustrating and they're smart enough to know they don't have to be involved.
5. Stubborn or belligerent people
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When they’re around people who refuse change or defend their absurd opinions with everything they’ve got, it’s draining for an intelligent person. They take pride in handling uncertainty and being able to think through problems without losing it, and it's frustrating to discourse with someone who seems to take so little pride in deciding what to defend.
6. Protecting people’s egos
Even though it’s annoying, smart people know better than anyone that they can only have productive conversations with insecure people if they cater to their needs. In order to solve a problem or stay on their good side, they have to stroke their ego and explain things in simple terms without coming across as condescending.
They know that if they don’t, these kinds of people will shut down and all that conversation will be for nothing. So, even when they’d rather work alone or talk about things without a filter, they find themselves having to protect someone's fragile ego and it is absolutely exhausting.
7. Endless notifications from their phone
Much like overstimulating social settings and loud public spaces, phone notifications can also grab a sensitive person’s attention and subtly drain their energy over the course of a day. During conversations, the mere presence of someone’s phone has been shown to be distracting and annoying.
However, in a hyper-digital society where it’s not always possible to disconnect completely from their cell phones, intelligent people often have to set boundaries and be intentional about avoiding draining notifications, shutting off all alerts except for the very most important ones.
8. Resentment or tension in a group
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Many intelligent people boast a high level of social awareness and ability to read a room. Most of the time, it’s a strength that allows them to have better conversations and explain complicated topics in a way that actually serves everyone. However, being open to the energy of a room also means they’re instantly aware of tension, resentment, and drama.
Yes, they can often walk away or set their boundaries, but at work or with their friends, it can feel impossible to not absorb this draining energy.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
