3 Basic Life Skills Every Gen-X Person Learned By The Age Of 12
Galyamin Sergej | Shutterstock If Gen-X kids had resumes by age 12, they would include a shopping list of life skills younger generations might not pick up until well into adulthood. As a generation, Gen X was adultified almost from the start. Parenting often had a much more laissez-faire attitude since the focus was more on providing for a child's physical needs than emotional nurturing.
When left to your own responsibility, you learn fast to pick yourself up, dust off, don't shed a tear, and get back to the task at hand. No one else is going to do it, and no one is coming to save you. A lot of these kids were on their own. No leash and no cell phone meant no limits, but also no immediate rescue, unless you were lucky enough to have a dime taped to your library card and could find a pay phone.
Here are three basic life skills every Gen-X person learned by the age of 12:
1. How to navigate life solo
By age 12, many Gen-X kids believed they would have to make their own way through life, explains Dr. Gloria Brame, Ph.D. They were the first generation where divorce wasn't whispered about but was the norm. By 1980, half of marriages were ending in divorce. Others became latchkey kids who returned after school to empty homes because their parents worked.
Generation X was forced to navigate solo as kids. Many 12 and 13-year-olds learned to cook, clean, and take care of younger siblings. They became anxious little adults who stayed quiet about their own feelings so they wouldn't burden their stressed-out parents with more problems.
As they grew up, their disinterest in traditional roles like marriage or work earned them the misnomer Slacker. The loneliness and hardship of fending for themselves as kids scarred many. With no outlets for their stress, they remain prone to social problems, depression, and loneliness in adulthood.
2. How to fend for themselves
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Career and life coach Lisa Petsinis knows many Gen-Xers learned to cook before the age of 12, often spending time in the kitchen with their mothers and grandmothers. It was both a way to connect and a chance to learn through doing — measuring, stirring, keeping an eye on what was in the oven. Cooking wasn’t treated as a special occasion. It was a part of daily life and an easy place for kids to step in and help.
Learning to cook was also incredibly practical. Parents were busy juggling work and caring for other children, and it was common to start dinner after school, even in a small way, by prepping ingredients and setting the table. That early responsibility also built planning skills and self-reliance that translated into confidence and capability in other areas of their lives as they grew up.
3. How to problem-solve
Gen-X was the first generation to grow up with video games, and by age 12, most had mastered the basics of gaming culture, continues Dr. Brame. Whether it was Atari, Nintendo, or spending hours in arcades pumping quarters into Pac-Man and Space Invaders, Gen-X learned hand-eye coordination, problem-solving, and persistence through early gaming.
Unlike today's games with save points and tutorials, early video games were brutal. You died, you started over from the beginning. No guides, no YouTube walkthroughs. Just trial and error until you figure out the pattern. This taught Gen-Xers to build resilience, tolerate frustration, stay calm, develop strategies, and keep trying until they succeeded.
What they didn't realize at the time was that they were actually building the foundation for the entire modern gaming industry. From Fortnite to Twitch streaming, today's multi-billion-dollar gaming culture exists because Gen-X proved video games weren't just a fad.
Gen-X has never stopped playing. Gen-Xers are still gaming. They may not realize they were the beta testers for what became one of the most dominant forms of entertainment in human history, and they're still at it.
4. How to be self-sufficient
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Not every Gen-X kid grew up totally latchkey, but those who did often weren't just a latchkey kid. They were the whole latch ring and chain, full of keys to all the locks needing to be opened. If there wasn't a key, they could pick the lock.
By 12, it was not unusual for me to cook a full meal from scratch, drive a pickup, and be left solely responsible for weeks unsupervised. When the parents returned, be the counselor for one parent, and recognize the behavioral changes that accompany intoxication in the other. All while commuting by BMX bicycle 5 miles to keep up my side gig sorting tokens, and cleaning games at the arcade.
A list of skills that would be sure to land an interview if I had been old enough to legally work. In so many ways, Gen-X kids prepared themselves well for their future careers.
Will Curtis is YourTango's expert editor. Will has over 14 years of experience as an editor covering relationships, spirituality, and human interest topics.
