Mom Asks If She’s Being ‘Dramatic’ For Revoking Mother-In-Law’s Access To Baby Monitor After Realizing She’s Watching All The Time
Has this MIL ever heard of basic boundaries?
Prostock-studio | Shutterstock What would you do if you found out your mother-in-law was spying on your parenting through your own baby monitor? You'd cut off her access to the baby monitor, right? That's exactly what one new mom tried to do, but unsurprisingly, major family drama ensued.
Boundaries are not exactly a mother-in-law's strong suit, at least judging by the stories on the internet. But there's nosy, meddling mothers-in-law, and then there's what a new mom on Reddit is experiencing, which is something more along the lines of felony privacy invasion. I don't even know if that's a real thing, but if not, we should invent it for this lady!
A mom revoked her mother-in-law's access to view her baby monitor after she used it to spy on her.
Now we all know mothers-in-law typically have a lot of opinions and ideas on how everything should be done, especially childcare for their beloved grandbabies, and this new mom's MIL is no exception.
"She’s always been a little intense," the mom wrote in her Reddit post. "Like, she’s the kind of woman who will call to say she saw a 'cuter' outfit for the baby than the one I posted on IG." But recently she's decided to have opinions on heaps of other things that are none of her business, and the way she is expressing them is downright insane.
fizkes | Shutterstock
The mom explained that the baby monitor she and her husband got for their four-month-old comes equipped with a camera that can be logged into remotely. "My MIL asked if she could have access to the baby monitor so she could 'see her grandchild grow up from afar,'" she wrote, and since they all live on opposite coasts, she reluctantly agreed. Huge mistake.
The mother-in-law has used the monitor to invade her privacy and criticize everything, even her clothes.
"What I didn’t realize is that she’d be watching us all the time," the mom wrote. "Like, not just the baby sleeping. She comments on things she has no business even noticing." Like, for instance, the "raggedy" robe she was wearing while breastfeeding one day. She even went so far as to text her son and offer to buy her a new one.
"I was so creeped out," she wrote. "I mean, that was clearly during a private moment, not just the baby napping." She also uses the monitor to give passive-aggressive parenting advice, like "I would’ve picked him up sooner, but you’re the mama!" which the mom said "feels like she’s judging me but trying to play it off as casual." Yes, and also DOING SO ON THE BASIS OF HAVING SPIED ON YOU THROUGH A BABY MONITOR CAMERA.
"She always acts like she’s trying to 'help' but it’s in a way that makes me feel like I’m constantly being watched and judged," she wrote. "It’s not mean, just kinda… boundary-pushy." Uh, yeah, ya think? This is unequivocally insane behavior, but you can probably guess what went down when she tried to curb it.
The mom's mother-in-law and husband were both upset when she revoked access to the baby monitor.
As seems to be standard procedure with these kinds of mothers-in-law, her husband basically took his mom's side. "He kinda just shrugged it off. He said something like, 'She doesn’t mean anything by it. She’s just observant. I grew up like that. We never had real privacy in the house.'" Okay, well, has it occurred to you that that was never normal and definitely isn't now that you're a grown man?
Understandably, the mom was having none of it and changed the login to the camera to keep her mother-in-law's prying out the heck out of her breastfeeding sessions, for God's sake. Now, of course, she's furious, and her son is defending her even more.
Sarah Chai | Pexels | Canva Pro
"He says it was harmless… and I could've just told her instead of 'going behind everyone's back,'" she wrote. "I told him I didn’t think I needed permission to stop someone from watching me in my own house." Yeah, that's basically how things work when people are not completely out of their minds!
As you might guess, nearly nobody on Reddit was on the MIL's or husband's side. Moms in the comments agreed that this was "incredibly violating" and many felt her husband was even more out of line than his mom, because his priority should be his wife, not his mommy.
As someone with an incredibly toxic and overbearing mother, I'd love to give the mama's boys of the world a word of advice: Your job is to take care of yourself, your spouse, and your kids, not to appease your mommy, who only acts like this because you let her. You are a grown man. Act like one, and tell your mom to get a grip. Hope this helps!
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.
