7 Things A Woman Should Never Have To Do When She Has A Husband
Men, prepare to take notes!
pocstock via Canva Marriage can be challenging at times, especially when multiple factors contribute to its difficulties. For instance, couples may struggle to agree on domestic activities and other responsibilities. Seeing eye to eye on these common topics includes clear communication, conflict resolution, and many other key elements that contribute to a loving, lasting relationship.
While some people have drifted away from traditional gender roles, some still slightly believe in them. That’s the case with Mr. Gen X, who took to TikTok to present his opinion on things he believes a woman should never have to do when she has a husband. One look online, and there are ample relationship content creators who hold a very similar love language. Of course, that’s one of many ways of showing love.
These are 7 things a woman should never have to do when she has a husband
1. Take out the trash
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The first thing on Mr. Gen X’s list, whether he’s in a marriage or serious relationship, a man should take out the trash. He explains, ''that's going to be the man's job for the remainder of his life.'' Some may think that taking out the trash is no big deal, what’s a few bins and trash bags? Why shouldn’t she take out the trash?
An online forum for the Guardian allows people to answer: Why do men always have to put out the garbage? Most of the responses come from men, and here is what a few have to say.
''Because it's reassuring to know we're good at something,'' says Daniel Owen from the UK.
"Boys' job, remember? So don't argue, just do it, you know you can't cook, and the last thing you need is a kitchen strike that might last for God knows when,'' explains Daniel Lillford from Canada.
2. Heavy yard work
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Mr. Gen X adds, ‘’Number two, she should never, ever have to worry about cutting the grass, doing yard work, unless she has her own little garden or something, and she's planting some sort of fruits or vegetables or some sort of roses.” He believes heavy-duty yard work, such as trimming the hedges and moving the lawn, is a man's job.
According to Julie Corliss from the Harvard Health Publishing, gardening and yard work like moving, raking, and planting are all productive ways to meet your physical activity goals. She quoted Harvard professor Dr. I-Min Lee, an expert on the role of physical activity in preventing disease, who said, ‘’Many yard and gardening tasks require enough effort to count as moderate-intensity exercise.’’
Corliss explains that the U.S. physical activity guidelines recommend people complete 150 minutes per week of moderate-intensity exercise. So, sharing gardening and yard work has its advantages.
3. Complete home repair or maintenance tasks around the house
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The third task on Mr. Gen X’s list of things a man should do when he’s in a serious relationship is home repair responsibilities. He emphasizes, ‘’If something were to break around the house or like the furnace or something, or some sort of plumbing issue, it's the man's job to try to figure it out…’’
Mr. Gen X understands that many home repair/ maintenance tasks are difficult. In those cases, it's still the man's job to make phone calls to get things fixed. He explains, ‘’She should never have to worry about trying to run around and take care of those sorts of things.”
Despite this belief, according to CBS News, 72% of men revealed they know how to handle very basic home repairs, and 40 percent say they either don’t know how to do anything around the house or prefer to call a handyman. Hope isn’t lost, as there are many home repair DIY content creators like Scott from Everyday Home Repairs available online to learn from.
4. Fix her car
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According to Mr. Gen X, ‘’if her vehicle breaks down, that's the man's job to try to figure out how to get that car fixed.’’ He feels a man should even help her with an oil change and get her car washed. Some people online agree with his sentiment. A user asks on an online forum on Loveshack, an online platform that offers collaboration opportunities to offer love/ relationship advice, the following question: Are auto mechanic skills attractive? Many agreed that they are.
One user responded, ‘’I'm definitely turned on by traditional man skills — fixing cars, handyman and construction work, hooking up electronics, fixing computer and tech stuff.”
Another user added, “My first wife loved my skillsets of carpentry, Mr. Fix It, or even can fix anything, including circuit boards in electronics, etc., etc.’"
One woman shared her frustration, saying, ‘’I never thought it mattered until I married a man that can't do [anything]. I have to do it myself or hire a handyman. I don't think it should be a deal breaker, but I think some traditional guy things are important.’’
5. Pay the bulk of the bills
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Mr. Gen X continues, “Number five, and one of the most important… It's the man's job to pay the bulk of the bills around the household.’’ While he understands that some households have a 50/50 agreement and sometimes even the wife pays the bulk of the bills, based on the way he was raised, it’s the man’s job to take care of his wife and pay the bulk of the bills. He further explains that it’s her job to ‘back you up anytime you need it.”
Rachel Varina from Brides presents best practices for sharing household expenses during marriage. She quotes marriage and family therapist Jeannelle Perkins, who said, ‘’Couples often face financial disagreements due to differing spending habits, power imbalances, financial stress, or poor communication.”
Therefore, it’s important to address financial responsibilities in a household. According to Varina, some recommendations include keeping all lines of communication open, assigning bills, and maintaining an emergency fund, among other tips.
6. Hide or downplay her intellect
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Unfortunately, a quick search online shows plenty of articles and content creators answering why many men are intimidated by intelligent women. A study even confirmed it, according to Christine Schoenwald, a freelance writer. Schoenwald explains that the study called (Psychological) Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder, ‘’found that while men like the idea of dating a smart woman, when it comes to the reality of it, they're not interested. And when a woman is better at a task than they are, they feel like less of a man.’’
Yes, men are attracted to smart women. In fact, it’s one of the strongest predictors of romantic interest. However, they don’t like to be outperformed or with women who are more ambitious than they are.
Even if research shows men are intimidated by a woman’s intelligence, there are online personalities who think otherwise. TikTok content creator Masionoo explained why he believes it’s a plus to be with an intelligent woman, saying, ‘’Having a smart, supportive woman is the cheat code for any ambitious man.’’ He then clarified, “Having somebody behind the scenes calculating every risk because they’re smarter than you and all you gotta do is go out there and be the bold… that you [were] born to be.’’
For example, he suggests consulting with her about your life opportunities. Then, if she recommends you go after them, go ahead and go after them. If she tells you to watch out for someone, reconsider your friends, acquaintances, and everyday encounters because they may not have your best interests.
7. Take on all parental responsibilities
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And, finally, in a marriage or serious relationship, a woman shouldn’t be taking on all parental responsibilities. According to the online platform Zero to Three, experts in child development, dads matter a lot. They explain, ‘’The relationship between father and child has a deep impact on a child’s overall and long-term healthy development.’’ Children will, for example, grow confident and form stronger connections with their peers.
Ways fathers can be involved in their kids’ lives, according to the Dakota Children’s Advocacy Center, include first to respect their children’s mother, read with their kids, teach their kids, discipline with love, allow them to be heard, and various other parental activities. Indeed, a family that shares parental responsibilities and cares for their children creates happier families.
While some of these practices may seem outdated, ultimately, it’s up to the couple to agree, and for some people, Mr. Gen X makes a lot of sense. Whether you use his advice or not, communicating with your partner is a must and an indicator that things are going in the right direction. It allows for conflict resolution. After all, who wants an unhappy wife or husband?
Mina Rose Morales is a writer and photojournalist with a degree in journalism. She covers a wide range of topics, including psychology, self-help, relationships, and the human experience.
