Stop Working So Hard to Find Love

Did you know that in the average day you thinkin 60,000 thoughts and the vast majority are negative, about yourself? That 93% of the images and words you see everyday go directly into your subconscious, forming all kinds of beliefs and patterns you are oblivious too? And did you furthermore know that of those images and words, the majority are filling your head with one major message:

'You are not enough.’

Which gets translated into things like …

“No one will ever love you.”
“Better to keep the relationship you have that risk not being loved at all.”
“If she/he doesn’t love you know one will.”
“You are damaged goods, unlovable.”
“You are all alone.”

Do you know where these crazy messages come from?

They are the voice of your inner critic, or what I like to refer to as your Inner Mean Girl for women or Inner Mean Dude for men. And they can be relentless, overbearing, and be a BIG downer and sabotager to your love life.

Unless that is, you have built up your Inner Wisdom to be stronger (more on that below). Just like training for a marathon and building physical muscles, to be a successful, happy and confident person with a fabulous love life, you’ve got to be strengthening your Inner Wisdom muscles to be stronger than your inner critics tricks -- and that means every day you and your Inner Wisdom are hitting the emotional, mental and spiritual gym.

You wouldn't go to the gym to start training your physical muscles the day before a marathon, would you? No way! You'd peril on the pavement. So why would the marathon of your love life be any different? It's not.

Put these 4 self-love and inner wisdom building super tips into practice daily and you will develop the confidence and conviction that you can do anything... no matter what the outside world is telling you:

Keep reading...

More Juicy Content From YourTango:

1. Stop Worrying About What Others Think. Trust Yourself
You can't be responsible for how everyone else thinks about how you live your life or run your love life, so stop worrying about how your family, partner and friends will react to your choices and start getting real about how you feel about your life. Act from what you think is right for you. We always know what the best action is to take for ourselves, when we slow down enough to listen to our inner wisdom. It's just not always easy to slow down or to trust our intuition. Be committed to trusting yourself, even when it's scary, and even when others disagree.

2. Become Best Buds with Your Inner Wisdom and follow it’s Intuition
Inside of you is the best life and decision making compass ever - your intuition, the voice of your Inner Wisdom. It always communicates what is best for you, but you have to be listening, and you have to trust its advice. Just like a best friend, if you're not calling, it will stop trying to contact you. If you keep asking for advice but don't take it, it will stop trying to help. Start listening for the communication cues of your intuition - through words you hear, images you see, feelings you have, and things you just know. Act based on what your Inner Wisdom’s intuition tells you and you will start to trust yourself more, and as a result create the love life and relationships you really want.

3. Never Apologize For Being You
Unfortunately the world is full of people, including our inner mean girls and inner bullies, that want to keep us small, playing along and being 'good' girls and boys. When you listen to them by apologizing for who you are, or by discounting your contributions, thoughts and feelings, you squash your self-love. Be brilliant. Be you. And never apologize for it. If you don’t love yourself, you can’t expect anyone else to either.

4. Create a community of likeminded people who support YOU
When you are surrounded by people who see you, love you and are on your side, your Inner Mean Girls and Dudes lose their power. In order to stay in charge, your inner critics love to use the tactic of telling you that you are all alone, that you are the only one who is all alone, and that you’ll never have the relationships you really want! Lies and lies and more lies. The truth is that you need connection with community to help you stay connected to the truth of who you are... and to feel loved. Find those connections that already support you, and create new ones that will continue to support you as you grow.

Stop Working So Hard To Find Love

Our Newsletters