Photo: TikTok
He says she's not allowed kiss anyone except dad.
By Jessica Bracken — Written on May 06, 2023
In a viral TikTok, a father told his daughter that she’s not allowed to have a boyfriend or kiss anybody “except for Daddy” until she's older.
This father and daughter had a playful fight over whether the girl was allowed to have a boyfriend or not at two years old, although it seemed like her father was taking the issue a bit more seriously than her. The father was under the impression that his daughter was “dating” one of her classmates named Jack and adamantly told her that she was not allowed to have a boyfriend until she was sixteen.
The girl’s father told her to break things off with Jack by telling him ‘Daddy’s my boyfriend.’
Commenters on the video thought the interaction was adorable. In nearly all of Kadie Johnson’s other TikTok posts, commenters joke about Jack or ask for updates about him. In a fishing video, the girl is “practicing her fishing for Jack” — when she’s playing dress-up, she’s “getting ready for Jack.”
While most viewers saw Johnson’s original video as a sweet, funny moment, some users pointed out how it could serve as an example of teaching kids patriarchal ideals and gender norms.
One user stitched the original video to bring up how it could potentially reinforce toxic gender norms. She pointed out that while the father was making it clear to his daughter that “daddy tells you who you can and can’t date,” he was simultaneously ignoring the affection his son was trying to express toward him, which the user says serves as an example of reinforcing gender roles.
Her main point was that the girl in the video was so young that her parents didn't need to be taking her claims that she was “dating” a boy in her class too seriously and that the way the girl’s dad handled the situation was “creepy and weird.”
It’s highly doubtful that the father in Johnson’s TikTok intended to cause any harm, but there is something to be said for how early gender roles are imposed on children. The girl’s parents and the commenters on the video were already assuming that this two-year-old girl will grow up to be interested in romantic relationships with men.
Sure, this might seem like a small issue, but heteronormativity can really affect people throughout their lives. Making early assumptions about children’s sexualities might make them feel less comfortable being open about their relationships later on.
Growing up famous on social media could affect kids in the future.
The comments on Johnson’s TikToks took these assumptions to another level, saying things like “When’s the wedding?” and “Jack is lucky.” With the rising popularity of social media accounts dedicated to parents posting cute videos of their kids, it can be concerning to see some commenters get overly invested in the kids’ lives.
One commenter remarked “Can’t wait to see her when she’s grown” about Johnson’s daughter. It’s difficult to predict how social media fame will affect kids since it’s such a new phenomenon.
Ultimately, Johnson’s video was a lighthearted moment between a father and his daughter. While the conversation could have been more focused on age-appropriate boundaries than making the girl feel like she was in trouble for expressing interest in someone, we can never get the full story from one TikTok.
Jessica Bracken is a writer living in Davis, California. She covers entertainment and news for YourTango.