Mom Tells Her Daughter's Teacher She's Opting Her Out Of Homework For The Year — People Are Saying She's Avoiding 'Responsibilities' To Her Kid

Elementary school students shouldn't be spending hours on their homework.

tiktok of mom saying she opted her daughter out of homework, children inside classroom raising their hands TikTok / Tima Miroshnichenko / Pexels

In a study done by the Washington Post, students reported doing an average of 2.7 hours of homework per weeknight. When asked how many hours students spent on homework in a day on average, answers ranged from zero to more than nine with an average of about four hours.

Many students indicated feeling high levels of stress from having to spend hours doing their homework at the end of the day when already having spent much of their day in school beforehand.


The mental toll homework sometimes takes on students left one mother with no choice but to step in and advocate that her daughter not be assigned any extra work for when she came home.

A mom opted her daughter out of doing homework for the entire school year due to mental and physical stress.

In a TikTok video, a mom explained that she decided to take action on behalf of her daughter, who is in the third grade. 

"I just emailed my daughter's third-grade teacher to let her know that we're opting out of homework this year because of the physical and mental stress it puts on her," she shared.

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Since her daughter is already at school for over seven hours each day, she felt her child was already being spread way too thin when coming home and working for even more hours on homework. She pointed out that homework for elementary school students is optional, as teachers can't force their students to complete assignments when they're not physically in school. 

"I know every kid is different and they learn differently, but when we tried to push homework on her because I didn't know that I could advocate this for her, it would stress her out and cause complete anxiety."

The mom informed viewers that she wasn't trying to be a difficult parent toward her daughter's teacher, but that she opted out of homework on the little girl's behalf for her wellbeing. She informed her daughter's teacher that when she gets home from school during the week, they set aside thirty minutes to do any required assignments.


"During that time she will complete her twenty minutes of reading, and then the [remaining] ten minutes, she can work on what was sent home," she said.

Per CNN, it's actually recommended by the National Education Association and the National Parent-Teacher Association that elementary school students should only be spending time on homework per grade level. That translates into 10 minutes of homework in the first grade, 20 minutes in the second grade, all the way up to 120 minutes in senior year of high school. 

So, for third graders, thirty minutes is the correct amount of time advised for them to spend doing homework every night.

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Studies have shown that giving elementary school students homework is detrimental.

According to research conducted by the Washington Post, homework is not considered helpful in elementary school, and can actually be harmful. Duke University psychologist Harris Cooper, concluded in 1989 that “for elementary school students, the effect of homework on achievement is trivial, if it exists at all," per the publication.

“Homework for young students should be short,” Cooper said, and “lead to success without much struggle.” 

As mentioned by CNN, a 2015 study conducted by The American Journal of Family Therapy found elementary school students were being assigned more homework than was recommended, sometimes almost triple the amount. 

The little girl's mother explained that it's important her daughter has time outside of the hours she spends in school to do things she actually enjoys and spend time with her family. Of course, she values her daughter's education, and these rules won't apply as she ages and starts middle and high school.


But for now, she isn't going to force her daughter to sit down and complete hours of homework after spending seven of the previous hours learning in school.

"Last year she didn't have any homework that required completion, and we noticed a huge change in her mental well-being," she remarked. "We are going to continue those standards going forward."

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Many people praised the young girl's mother for setting boundaries on homework.

"Yes, I agree it should be like [this]... kids are feeling overwhelmed at school. [They shouldn't have to] come home and work," one TikTok user wrote.


Another user agreed, pointing out that by doing limiting homework, it teaches children the importance of boundaries and balance.

"My grandmother was a teacher for many years. She always said if you can't teach what you need during the school day then you're a bad teacher," a following user wrote.

However, other people weren't on board with the idea and brought up that it actually might be more harmful to children.


"This is why this new generation doesn't know how to handle responsibilities," a commenter argued. "You guys can still spend time together after completing homework."

A third user rebutted that it's important for children to practice the material they learn at school when they get home, or else they can fall behind.

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Nia Tipton is a writer living in Brooklyn. She covers pop culture, social justice issues, and trending topics.