Photo: TikTok
She is doing her best.
By NyRee Ausler — Written on Feb 06, 2023
Parenting can be a difficult and exhausting job. It takes love, patience, and understanding to raise healthy and well-adjusted children.
The challenges are multiplied in kids who have been diagnosed with autism. The condition is often associated with physical and verbal aggression in the form of screaming, hitting and out-of-control outbursts.
A distraught mother named Jemima recently shared an inside look at what it’s like to deal with a child who has autism on her TikTok account.
In a TikTok, the mom patiently allowed her autistic son to repeatedly hit her during an episode.
The video is captioned, “So sorry for the ugly crying, but I guess what I want from this is to make others aware that they’re not alone and it will pass. It is hard work.”
It opens with Jemima sobbing in a room as she repeatedly tries to block her son’s attempts to slap her face over and over with little success.
Between sobs, she explains that this particular episode has been going on for over an hour nonstop.
Jemima tells people watching, “This is not even one of the worst of what it can be like when you have an autistic child.”
Jemima tells viewers that she just “can’t win.” She shakes her head back and forth and says it’s rough.
Next, the scene changes and it’s just the patient mother on camera showing everyone the aftermath of the lengthy attack by her son.
Jemima’s eyes are red and puffy and her face has clearly visible signs that she had been slapped many times.
At first, she can’t seem to find the words to say but eventually offers, “I guess I don’t mean to offend anyone. And this is one of those things where you’re not alone.”
People in the comments offer both support and advice. One woman posted, “Autistic or not, no Is no. Needs firm and have boundaries… from one that works with autism 24/7.”
Another TikToker, familiar with the struggle that comes with rearing a child with autism wrote, “Autism mum here [too] I get you! And then you lose your temper.”
“Then you feel guilty. It’s a horrible cycle! Sending you reassurance. You’re doing great and you are not alone.”
According to psychologists, there are many things that can trigger aggressive behavior in autistic children.
Things like sensory overload, changes to routine, communication problems, and physical changes can set them off.
Some ways to prevent and minimize the behavior are avoiding overreacting, journaling events and patterns, and praising good conduct while being clear that misbehaving will not be rewarded.
But there are times when the dynamics between you and your child may be too much to deal with.
The Association for Child and Adolescent Mental Health (ACAMH) provides services for children and young people who are unable to manage their behavior or emotions. Reach out to them for resources and help.
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NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington, and author of seven books. She covers lifestyle and entertainment and news, as well as navigating the workplace and social issues.