Photo: Facebook / Michael Gerry
A decision nobody should have to make.
By Kurtis Condra — Written on Aug 09, 2022
When Michael Gerry Fotheringham McConnell's wife was going into labor, he got a call that nobody ever wants to hear, and he says his "heart froze" when he heard what the doctor said.
The doctor told him that he would have to make a choice that nobody should have to make.
Because of a dangerous complication, the doctor asked McConnell to choose between his unborn child's life or his fiancee.
Speaking to the Mirror UK about what happened, McConnell spoke said his fiancee Stephanie Brown gave birth to a child back in November 2021, weighing less than a bag of sugar, 1.3 lbs.
Their son Mickey sadly passed away eight months later on July 24 due to health complications.
The year prior, at 18 weeks pregnant, Brown began leaking amniotic fluid, the substance surrounding the fetus, so they booked an appointment to take further tests to find the cause of the problem.
When they arrived at the hospital the doctors believed their unborn child's heart was "too big" so instead they were referred to a heart specialist but that scan showed the child's lungs were too small for his body and disproportionate to the rest of his organs.
McConnell and Brown were given the heartbreaking news that their son, who they named Mickey, would not make it full term.
The doctors asked Stephanie if she could carry her pregnancy for six more weeks to help the child's organs develop properly.
McConnell was then given the news that made his heart stop.
As McConnell was at the hospital with his wife, the doctors came to him and took him to the side, and told him the news.
"The doctor that would deliver took me to one side and asked, 'if push comes to shove, who survives? Mum or the baby?'" McConnell said.
The situation became serious as the doctors revealed the umbilical cord collapsed, this could've been an Umbilical cord prolapse, but McConnell did not go into detail.
Despite everything that was happening, both parents still wanted to deliver their child, but the doctors advised he may not make it.
"I've been by her side through the worst and scariest times in my life, and with her losing fluid, having to hold my boy in her body for six weeks, it was exhausting, physically and mentally," he said. "There was a good chance that the placenta had stuck on Steph's stomach and bladder; the classical Caesarian was their answer to prevent this being a danger."
Stephanie survived and gave birth to Mickey who weighed only 1lbs 3oz, in November of 2021.
They were happy to see their son improve from neonatal intensive care.
Mickey was relocated closer to home, and as the McConnell and Brown were ready to take their son home, his condition began to deteriorate.
His body became too big for his lungs, but there was no answer as to why Mickey's health deteriorated.
After a long battle, Mickey passed away peacefully in his mother's arms on July 24.
Michael paying tribute to his son called him his "wee warrior," saying, "He was the brightest star I've ever known. I'll never forget the impact my boy made on this earth, he truly was a warrior."
McConnell praised his fiancee for her strength and determination in going through what she went, calling her an "inspiration," saying since having Mickey, she gave all her love and time to their son, all while dealing with home life as well.
"This has been physically, mentally, and emotionally draining, as we've had sleepless nights and traumatic days - but we have been there for each other," he said.
A GoFundMe page has been set up for Michael and Stephanie and the goal has been reached thanks to the love and support of those who wanted to help the couple.
Kurtis Condra covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics for YourTango. He is also a poet based in San Francisco, California. You can keep up with his poetic journey on Instagram.