Photo: TikTok
He wanted a safe space.
By Zayda Slabbekoorn — Written on Feb 02, 2023
Angsty, irritable, flamboyant — teenagers can be a full-time job for a parent.
Not only is it incredibly difficult to navigate when they’re with you, but it can be even harder when they’re not.
Being a teenager is a glimpse at adulthood — always wanting to adventure out, explore new places with friends, and have time to learn about themselves.
It’s a new stage, which can be anxiety-inducing for parents. But, mostly, parents just worry that they’re safe and happy.
This dad made it his mission to make sure that his teenagers, and all of their friends, always felt that way — safe, happy, and at home.
Opening his home to all of his teenager’s friends, this dad aspires to be the safe space for ‘hangouts’ — something he always wished he had growing up.
This TikTok dad ‘works really hard’ to make his home a safe space for his teenagers and their friends.
Advocating and speaking to parents on TikTok, this dad shares the steps he took to make his home ‘The Home’ for all his teenager’s hangout sessions.
He emphasizes that it’s not just opening your doors and letting your teenagers huddle together in their bedroom, but rather opening your mindset to get to know them.
Being the adult that truly cares, makes them feel welcome, and advocates for their safety is the mission of this TikTok dad.
It’s this mindset that is ‘so important,’ as hundreds of comments relay.
The couple builds and incorporates activities like axe throwing and basketball to keep their teenagers occupied.
“One thing that we, my wife and I work really hard at,” the dad says, “is being the house that the teenage friends of my children want to hang out at.”
They create their ‘hangout house’ aura in a variety of ways, as the TikTok dad relays in his video, and one of the ways is to keep them entertained.
“We have activities for them,” the dad mentions, “I built an axe throwing thing, we have basketball, we have all kinds of stuff.”
Even though this part is important — the appeal of fun at their house for the teenagers, this isn’t ‘the most important’ part of their hangout mindset as parents.
The couple is sure to stock their pantry and fridge with all the teenager’s ‘favorite foods and drinks.’
“We intentionally ask our children’s friends what kind of food they like, what kind of drinks they like, and then we make sure that we have those things on hand for them,” he says about his wife and him.
Asking these teenagers questions about their likes and interests, and actually listening is part of their great parenting style.
Not only are these parents getting to know the friends in their children’s lives, but they’re also giving them a safe place to relax and have fun.
Being ‘That House’ is a mindset – the couple’s empathetic attitude makes teenagers feel welcome in their home.
“It’s one of the best things that we’ve ever done. We get to know our kid’s friends and we know that they’ll be hanging out here.”
After parents continue to ask questions and comment concerns on the video, the dad takes it upon himself to make a follow-up video to help assist these parents in their mindset.
“The first thing that it takes is intentionality,” he states plainly.
Wishing that you had a home where your kids want to hang out and actually making a change so they do is a huge difference.
For parents who really truly want to build that space for their teenagers, they can learn a lot from his response video.
“You need to have the desire to want kids in your home. That means that you have to have this internal capacity to deal with the chaos that teenagers bring.”
In addition to wanting to be ‘The Home’ for teenagers, he also mentions you must have a “disposition of hospitality.”
He draws out what that looks like in his home — “welcome kids when they come over, invite them back when they leave, tell them that their presence was delightful to have in your home.”
To end the video, he shares a heartfelt moment he shared with one of his teenager’s friends — something that reminds him why he crafted the safe space from the beginning.
After spending the day at his home, the teenager said, “I’m moving in here!” Smiling the dad happily responded, “Well, then my prayers have been answered.”
“That really touched them,” he says about being like a second parent to your children’s friends.
So whether you’re an advocate for teenagers or a parent looking to revamp their home – this TikTok dad surely has some tips about kindness and intention.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a news and entertainment writer who focuses on pop culture analysis and human interest stories. Catch up with them on Instagram or TikTok.